tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72811976890334257762024-03-13T03:21:18.329+00:00Feeding Time With The Boozey SwineA blog about what some would call 'comfort food'...Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.comBlogger59125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-80666292768380519392016-03-22T18:34:00.000+00:002017-04-11T11:49:53.625+01:00Fried Salami, Egg, Cheese and Hot Sauce Sandwich<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The demise of the 24 hour supermarket in my town has meant that my drunken culinary adventurousness is very much constrained by what I soberly purchase during office hours.<br />
This, perhaps, isn't such a bad thing. I find supermarkets to be cathartic places (when attended at less populous hours) and the last thing I need is to be walking around one knowing I'd been stumbling around the same isles, in the early hours, endlessly comparing cheeses. I do not need fear here.<br />
Now I purchase one or two items per trip with no predetermined plan in mind, only to hide them at the back of the fridge for the hungry late night adventurer to discover and decide the best path for.<br />
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I've felt that I haven't been maximising the potential of the salami in my sandwich. I'd mostly used it as a replacement for 'plainer' meats, the flavour is wonderful but if you're not careful in your layering, it can drag out all the other contents on the first bite. I wanted to see if it'd be a good addition to a sandwich when in a crisped up condition.<br />
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Was it?<br />
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Was. It. Fuck.<br />
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Here's what went into one of the best decisions of my life:<br />
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<li>White bread. Always the best option for fried sandwiches. Grains and seeds and shit just confuse matters. If you don't want to use a standard sliced loaf like this, a harder sourdough or tiger bread loaf will work great too. Those breads actually work best when they're a couple of days out of date as they're harder and crisp up a lot better. Obviously don't let shit get to the mouldy point. That's not gonna do any of us any favours. </li>
<li>Hot Sauce. I used this Encona Hot Pepper Sauce, it's got a savage kick off it from Habanero and Scotch Bonnet Peppers but its fruity flavour always manages to sneak a few points past that defence. </li>
<li>The cheese was the always reliable and delicious Kilmeaden cheddar. Buy a block and grate it yourself. It just tastes better that way.</li>
<li>The salami was Italian made, very important to buy Italian in this regard. </li>
<li>The egg, if you needed to know, was straight from the arse of a well treated Cill Dara chicken. Up the Lilies, Kildare for Sam.</li>
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I'm not a big fan of messing around. Three frying pans was in no way excessive for this operation. It was simply what I needed to get the job done.<br />
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<li> The grey pan up the front is my primary, this is where the bread goes. It has the largest surface area and is closest to me for easy flipping/catchment of spillage.</li>
<li>My secondary pan is the white fella. This is for the salami. It's positioned at the back, and please bare with my attention to positioning detail, it's of the utmost importance. Salami has the potential to spit like a scumbag kangaroo so you don't want to get burned, keep it away from you. It will also, in the moments leading up to its transcendence into crispy glory, start to smoke like an aul lad after mass so you want it under the extractor fan as much as possible with the least possibility of it hitting the general air population/smoke alarm and alerting other inhabitants to your exploits.</li>
<li>Frying pan numero trois is for the egg. I could have done this in the salami pan but it's currently experiencing a suspension issue, causing the egg to flow to the edge and fry in an awkward shape.</li>
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The standard operating procedure when it comes to frying a sandwich is low and slow. A low temperature pan for a longer time will achieve the 5 star outside crispness in tandem with complete inside meltiness. </div>
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1. Butter one side of the bread, this side hits the pan. </div>
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2. Mayonnaise the other side. </div>
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3. Cheese on top of that. </div>
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4. Slice of bread on top of that. </div>
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5. Butter the slice of bread you're now looking it. </div>
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6. Check after a couple of minutes. If it looks good, flip it. </div>
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7. Check the second side after just 1 minute, because of some science trickery it seems to cook quicker. </div>
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Hot pan for the salami, no oil needed, you want to remove some of the oil that's already in the meat. Flip regularly and watch carefully, this will burn quick. You'll know when it's done because it'll attain the rigidity of a thick crisp and the smell of Willy Wonka's Factory had he been raised by pig farmers. </div>
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The egg I fried in coconut oil because my health is my wealth. </div>
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Scheduling the 3 frying pan cook off isn't difficult, the salami can start the same time as the bread. It'll cook quicker but it'll keep well on a sheet of kitchen paper. The egg, I cracked when I flipped the bread, you'll want it with a runny yolk when it lands on the inside...</div>
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Now its time to move fast, split the sandwich apart in its pan and lash some hot sauce on one side and the crisped salami on the other. The egg then joins these two powerhouses together, try not to break the yolk like I did.</div>
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<i>There's beauty hiding between that bread.</i></div>
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Well now... If that doesn't strike you as one of the most beautiful visions you have ever seen, head somewhere else because the rest of this post is just an excuse for gratuitous close ups. </div>
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But first. Taste. It had ALL the taste. It had everything. Perfectly fried and crispy bread encasing melted cheese infused with mayonnaise on one side. A nicely balanced hot sauce getting only slightly aggressive on the other side... When all of a sudden the greatest noise and simultaneous burst of flavour you've ever experienced inside your own head blindsides you with the first crunch of the salami. It's like meat and crisps in one. I'll repeat that, <b>it's like meat and crisps in one fucking thing</b>... But we don't even have time to give that the attention it deserves because the egg yolk has just ruptured... the bland egg white doesn't stand a chance.. it has to join in the party... The hot sauce is swinging from the ceiling... The room is going wild... I'm out of breath... </div>
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I think you get what I'm trying to give you. This sandwich was all kinds of right.</div>
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Of course I went for round 2. I had a little look see for some cheese slices to increase the odds a bit. I had one. It'd have to do.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWqduwm_qwV1hvvSOw0_1PcVl25PW0AOensgCSjhyphenhyphen9DUZpePSw5zd83YGch7KpWjFYeC_VRHNuyg4pJk6bzHGeTQQLUaurVpos-abx8avfLsAm1XcCPsaMbbP5zS4X2YvDiOVPldwCOXE/s1600/IMG_4457.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="135" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWqduwm_qwV1hvvSOw0_1PcVl25PW0AOensgCSjhyphenhyphen9DUZpePSw5zd83YGch7KpWjFYeC_VRHNuyg4pJk6bzHGeTQQLUaurVpos-abx8avfLsAm1XcCPsaMbbP5zS4X2YvDiOVPldwCOXE/s400/IMG_4457.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I made myself a little crisp to nibble on out of some spare grated cheese until number two was ready to go... and by Christ, was it...</div>
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<i>It gets better...</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIMUS4X_03PQWtsZLvk9CLK4j2pYtQIvagiqSdMqRyBtXFwUOC0UizV869c2MyLSrZpMMrKs9fBBaIfWXjWmIyFGN3aM04Z9oyxIwKTsq7GzctkWDwHrNYnuRZgHWc3E062DXlpIzWaXQ/s1600/IMG_4452.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIMUS4X_03PQWtsZLvk9CLK4j2pYtQIvagiqSdMqRyBtXFwUOC0UizV869c2MyLSrZpMMrKs9fBBaIfWXjWmIyFGN3aM04Z9oyxIwKTsq7GzctkWDwHrNYnuRZgHWc3E062DXlpIzWaXQ/s400/IMG_4452.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>LOOK.</i></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhugmMxBUANP76TJrIL3msYbMRjCPrsIkY3ZvVJRylRCU1VaulkE8Pdba3ugKdnzxeU67Tpe403e6yzdfvb5RQfxVODmxmJ_u7ikplFmXnj-maGgBW0K1AjSb2FSbVKrycfyJ0Eft3GVz8/s1600/IMG_4451.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhugmMxBUANP76TJrIL3msYbMRjCPrsIkY3ZvVJRylRCU1VaulkE8Pdba3ugKdnzxeU67Tpe403e6yzdfvb5RQfxVODmxmJ_u7ikplFmXnj-maGgBW0K1AjSb2FSbVKrycfyJ0Eft3GVz8/s400/IMG_4451.JPG" width="398" /></a></div>
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<i>I'LL NEVER CREATE BETTER.</i></div>
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A cheese slice was a good move. A cheese slice is always a good move.</div>
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I've nothing more to say on the matter.</div>
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Until next time. </div>
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B.S X</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-66717316681198323682015-12-15T19:47:00.000+00:002017-04-11T11:50:12.998+01:00Mediterranean Wrap with out of date Kebab Sauce<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I think it was a combination of the cold and miserable weather, my advancing years, the 4 cans of Strongbow stewing in my gut and the absolute certainty that no one in their right mind would be going for midweek pints that made me stop 100m down the road, utter 'fuck this' to no soul in particular and head back home to fire whatever remnants of food were around into a sandwich.<br />
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I went for a ramble around Dunnes the other evening looking for wraps to test out my new €17 George Foreman Grill knock off (Spoiler: It's a ball of shite). They'd none of the standard plain ones left but I did spot these yokes. In standard Dunnes own brand fashion they're not about to spark off any seismic sensory overload in the taste or texture department but the most important thing in this instance was their structural integrity which was near Volvo standard.<br />
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On a separate expedition I picked up a bottle of Paul Newman's Caesar dressing on the basis that I really liked him in the Towering Inferno. Also on the agenda was a sliced tomato, grated cheese, a bit of mixed salad and red onion along with a bottle of Kebab Sauce that I picked up a good while ago in un supermarché en France and had been saving for a special occasion. Unfortunately when I checked the date it was a month past its best but in the interest of "I didn't suffer through a 19 hour ferry from France to fuck it in the bin without tasting it first" it still got squirted into the sandwich.<br />
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The pictured amount of cheese went onto the meat of the sandwich, 4 hardy, chopped up, chicken goujons, along with some mayo and hot sauce. This went into the oven to melt. I then decided that I wanted more cheese so I grated up a similar dosage to go in the sandwich cold because I still live in a free country. <br />
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A couple of minutes in the oven was enough to warm this wrap which was openable (I'm using it in a sentence so it's a word) in a pitta style, before I started building up the salads on a base of Caesar Sauce. A drizzle of the (almost certainly rancid) Kebab Sauce topped off this chapter.<br />
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Next the cold bonus cheese got piled on.</div>
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Finally the warm, melty gooey mess of the chicken with melted cheese, </div>
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mayo and hot sauce was slid on to complete the travesty. </div>
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For a delivery device that has the thickness of 2 green Rizla's the Mediterranean Wrap held together to the bitter (that kebab sauce again) end. Again not much in the line of spectacular taste or flair, but it did what was asked of it. </div>
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Since I have no point of reference as to what this particular Kebab Sauce should taste like in its prime all I can remark upon is its strong garlicy flavour, whether or not it was meant to be like that I'm not sure but it certainly didn't put me off finishing this sandwich. Paul Newman's Sauce should be applied with extreme caution, though, not with a 16 year old lashing on the Joop degree that I went to. It's overpowering to say the least and probably not the best addition to a sandwich, but 'nothing ventured, nothing gained' as the fella says.</div>
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B.S. x</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-58328582815673818032014-10-04T14:08:00.000+01:002017-04-11T11:57:25.443+01:00The Loaded Breakfast Muffin<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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The best way to start tackling a bastard of a hangover is quite obviously with breakfast, regardless of the time of day you get around to consuming it. I'm fond of a good breakfast sandwich. And by good I obviously mean full of absolute shite.<br />
The filled breakfast muffin is a popular item in the U.S and has been brought to a certain level of worldwide acclaim/notoriety/indifference by the mega stars of the fast food industry... If you like your eggs delivered in a shape and texture similar to that of an empty tin of shoe polish stick to the big lads. I, on the other hand, like to take the best parts of their breakfast and combine it with the best parts of ours.<br />
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Obviously while a lot of the sandwiches I make are influenced by my own hangover or with the average hangover sufferer in mind and thus it's generally accepted that they'd be consumed while alone in a darkened room it's perfectly acceptable to eat them in the company of friends and family.<br />
<i><b>Not this mess though.</b></i><br />
Please assure that you are utterly alone should you ever plan to eat one of these.<br />
My quest to find a bread that will contain the contents of this boxset of arterial damnation adequately so that it doesn't shatter under the weight of its own depravity without sacrificing on overall taste continues... I will always prioritise the quality (I mean taste) of food over the ability to consume it with dignity in the company of others. This lad is gonna disintegrate in your hands and you'll have to accept that you're gonna be sucking melted cheese mixed with rasher juice and egg yolk off each and every one of your glistening knuckles.<br />
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I've done a fairly significant amount of research into the subtleties and nuances of the perfect breakfast sandwich, so much so that I probably don't need to worry too much about saving into a pension account, and what I quickly realised is that this is an arena with many possibilities and no outright winner. Feel free, obviously says you, to change or add anything should you attempt this sandwich, this is merely one of my favourites. One word of warning though, I'll explain more later and it'll sound quite unusual coming from me: <b><i>"Don't triple the cheese"</i></b>.<br />
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The ingredients of this particular equation are:</div>
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<ul>
<li>A Breakfast Muffin</li>
<li>2 Slices of Processed Cheese</li>
<li>2 Sausages (plain ones, nothing fancy)</li>
<li>1 Rasher</li>
<li>3 Hash Browns (small)</li>
<li>1 Egg</li>
<li>2 Thin Slices of White Pudding</li>
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Two notable absentees from the list are Black Pudding and any sauce. While I like black pudding in a fry up or in the odd breakfast roll, I find it has too strong and overpowering a flavour for the majority of breakfast sandwiches. There's no sauce because cheese is my sauce, baby. </div>
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I'll presume that it is within your capabilities to fry up these few bits. (The hash browns are in doing a bit of time in the oven)<br />
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<i>Pull the muffin apart with your hands instead of cutting it, it makes for a much nicer toast.</i></div>
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Now I'm not saying you have to but if you felt the need after you'd toasted your muffin to sit both sides face down in the hot frying pan so they soaked up the grease and flavours from the rasher, sausages and pudding that have recently been cooked there, I for one certainly wouldn't judge you.<br />
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Now that everything is cooked we face the difficult part... <b><i>The Assembly...</i></b><br />
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I'm not currently in possession of a degree in engineering but I doubt it would make much difference to the structural integrity of this sandwich if I was. This is not staying together for long. You really need to build quick and eat even quicker... The cheese I used here being a double edged sword... For the first 30 to 60 seconds, while the cheese is in the first phase of it's melt, it'll act like a glue. Any longer than this (as it approaches its near perfect liquid phase) and it'll only serve to lubricate the constituents of the sandwich and they'll slide apart. I mentioned earlier about not tripling the cheese; This sandwich looks to me anyway, like it could handle more cheese. It can't. I've made these with 3 slices and that much just distracts from all the pig meat you should be savouring equally. That and the fact that the particular budget priced fast melting brand I use state on the packaging that each slice is only 48% cheese. Not that I worry too much about that side of things but... 48%?!<br />
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Right, on with the building. After I'd toasted and grease soaked my muffin I went with a sturdy base of hash browns, a slice of 48%, the sausage and then a rasher...<br />
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On top of that went a fried egg (this is actually one of my better looking fried eggs), another slice of glue and finally the white pudding before I closed it up...<br />
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I don't know if this strikes you as a thing of beauty but for me it doesn't get any better. The melted cheese clinging onto the egg white giving it a purpose in life, the egg yolk mixing with the white pudding, the delicious but massively underrated combination of sausage and hash brown doing their own little cheesey dance all the while the rasher is in the middle just being an absolute rasher... And then after one bite it all falls apart to shite... It matters not a jot though, just get stuck in with your two hands, and hopefully, if you've taken my advice, nobody is watching.<br />
Now I ate this yesterday and, admittedly, though I don't feel great now I'll put that down to the fact that apart from 4 pints, a few cans and an off license impulse purchase of something vaguely apple flavoured called a "Nutron"* this was the sole nutrition to enter my body in the last 24 hours.<br />
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<span style="text-align: start;">*<i>I have it on good authority that the 'Nutr' in "Nutron" has fuck all to do with Nutrition.</i></span></div>
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Anyway, chance it, the sandwich, not the test tube yoke, just maybe eat an actual apple or something later on...</div>
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- Boozey Swine</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-69961803165731886182014-08-28T21:05:00.000+01:002017-04-11T11:56:45.609+01:00Hot Dogs Both Ways (Sober and Drunk)<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I and, I think I'd be right in assuming, a lot of other Irish people have a complicated relationship with hot dogs. They don't offend me, I like them, but I eat them quite rarely in comparison to the other fast food staples. Put this down to their lack of availability, comparatively speaking to other countries where they're on every corner and in every shop, or the fact that most chippers make an absolute hames of them by thinking lettuce and red sauce are appropriate combination of toppings and by burning the absolute bollox out of the dog in the deep fat fryer, if you'll excuse the imagery.<br />
Personally I want something more substantial and a burger is always going to fill that void over a hot dog anyday.... But I do like the occasional hot dog... and I think they can be something better so this is where that journey begins.<br />
Unknown hours (likely in the region of 2) of research were spent running videos past my eyes and reading recipes and tutorials about 'The Perfect Hot Dog' before I landed at this, my main event of Hot Dogs <i>(we'll get to my other, drunken, variety later on)</i>, a combination of a few of the best ways of eating hot dogs out there which I rolled into one super dog and proceeded to double in size and package in a common as muck roll.<br />
I guarantee if you eat one of these you'll never go back to a simple dog again.<br />
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At first glance some of the techniques in this operation may seem a little excessive, but trust me, they all serve a purpose, so stick with me...<br />
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<b><i>Round 1: Sober.</i></b><br />
Let's address exactly what this beast is right from the start: 2 hot dogs stuffed with processed cheese, wrapped in bacon, fried in a load of onions and green peppers, laid down on a bed of the aforementioned bacon infused vegetables along with some mayonnaise, topped off with the traditional red sauce and mustard all encased in a freshly baked baguette.<br />
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The ingredients are very straight forward; your sauces, onion and pepper, streaky rashers, hot dogs of your choosing, a standard aul par baked baguette (the stuff of bread purists horrors) and shit cheese... I say 'shit' cheese, firstly because that's a fact but more so because I've recently come to realise for functions such as this, where quick and consistent melting is paramount, the cheaper and lesser known the brand name the better. The brand name I'm using escapes me but I'm picking up slices regularly from a German dealer in town for a unit cost of 7.5cent when bought in 10's. You'll also need some cocktail sticks to hold the rashers in place.</div>
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Carefully slicing a hot dog length-ways and shoving bits of, what can doubtfully be legally considered, cheese into it is not the most satisfying or glamorous thing you're ever going to do in a kitchen but persevere with it.<br />
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Wrap a rasher around it and stick a cocktail stick through both ends to hold it in place.<br />
<i>(A sentence I never envisioned typing) </i><br />
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Set those lads off with a bit of oil in a hot pan. Now is also a good time to tell you that you should have put that baguette in the oven before even touching the hot dogs.<br />
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Chop up about half an onion and half a pepper per double hot dog roll.</div>
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Fire them into the pan along with the hot dogs. Don't be concerned about cheese leakage <i>(another sentence I never thought I'd type)</i>, it'll either burn and crisp into the rashers or get lost in the mix of peppers, onions and rasher grease that's all going to end up in your roll anyway.<br />
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One of these baguettes takes about 10 minutes in the oven to hit optimal breadness, leaving it to chill out for at least 5 minutes afterwards ensures you won't get severely burned and more importantly the roll won't disintegrate in your hand when you go to cut into it. I suggest cracking a bottle of Finkbrau from the aforementioned German dealer (from which I received no commercial incentive to mention) while you wait. Slice it open and get very generous with the mayonnaise.</div>
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When the rashers look cooked and nice 'n' crispy you're ready to roll, if you'll pardon the pun. Get them out of the pan and remove all the cocktail sticks, you'll have a bad day otherwise. </div>
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When the peppers and onions are tender and a little brown you know you're good to go.</div>
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Load them into the roll.</div>
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Hold that gloriously bacon and cheese infused veg in place with the 2 hot dogs laid end to end on top.</div>
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Top with the traditional combo of American mustard and red sauce. Serve with a freezing cold beer and thank me for the next 5 to 7 minutes of Heaven that you're about to experience....</div>
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<b><i>Round 2: Drunk.</i></b></div>
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And then, unsurprisingly, after my evenings business was attended to and a few pints were consumed down my local, I arrived home with the urge for a bit of grub pestering me...</div>
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Now I have it ingrained in myself not to operate any more kitchen equipment than is absolutely necessary while mildly, or otherwise, intoxicated. If you can get away with just operating an oven and leaving the hot frying pan out of your life then I thoroughly recommend it for the well being of yourself and the fellow occupants of your home.</div>
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It's highly unlikely, at the stage of the night, that you'll be arsed with all that stuffing cheese into the hot dog carry on. The drunken gut wants strong flavours, hot spices, cheese and none of your fancy stuff. Quickly and with as little hassle as is drunkenly or humanly possible bake a roll and then put a few slices of cheese into it arranged like above...</div>
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You can be sure I still wanted fried onions though so I compromised and chopped some up onto a plate and poured a little olive oil and black pepper over them then threw them into the oven along with the cheesed up roll for a few minutes to heat and melt all that stuff nicely.</div>
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Then as I put the onions on top of the cheese I remembered I had Tabasco Sauce. Ace.</div>
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After I destroyed the onions with Tabasco I lashed on a load of mayo and threw in 2 hot dogs that I microwaved to perfection, and topped it all off with the obligatory mustard and red sauce. This was an utter success, I'd be only delighted to eat it sober. The only problem I had was I still wasn't full and I was out of baguettes.... And there was only one measly slice of bread left...</div>
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<b><i>The Bonus Round: Desperation.</i></b></div>
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I think you see where this is going. One slice of bread, toasted, cut in half, topped with a folded over slice of cheese on each side, onions, pepper and olive oil and into the oven....</div>
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Then topped it off in the now familiar manner....</div>
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And if my memory serves me correctly, there wasn't a damn thing on Earth wrong with this effort either... </div>
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Hot dogs are great, we just need to, as a nation, put a little bit more effort and imagination into what we do with them, it's not that hard at all to make them feel a little more special... They're back on the menu in my world...</div>
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Boozey Swine</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com58tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-48692291492533782842014-08-14T01:50:00.001+01:002017-04-11T11:56:24.798+01:00Rasher Sandwich - An Exercise in Hangover Obliteration.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
This post was originally written for, and published on, '<a href="http://www.tv3.ie/3e/thread/" target="_blank">The Thread'</a> in June 2014. It is an update/extra strength version of <a href="http://www.theboozeyswine.com/2011/12/simple-auld-rasher-sandwich.html" target="_blank">My Favourite Rasher Sandwich</a>...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrUAt3Acl5dxaqCx1QGZVd35K16eLIja1Dm2XcdBltJ9B0kllO3Df2ChTSppb49z7Tf1mrWeZHXSWtfhiKrsUt9SEE5abTR5f4YYdEXEWR5dqeMoqINKPtQmBBL7u2bhyphenhypheniavd3D8XbhOA/s1600/12.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrUAt3Acl5dxaqCx1QGZVd35K16eLIja1Dm2XcdBltJ9B0kllO3Df2ChTSppb49z7Tf1mrWeZHXSWtfhiKrsUt9SEE5abTR5f4YYdEXEWR5dqeMoqINKPtQmBBL7u2bhyphenhypheniavd3D8XbhOA/s1600/12.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Ingredients:<br />
Streaky Bacon<br />
White Cheddar Cheese, sliced.<br />
Red Cheddar Cheese, grated.<br />
Cream Cheese.<br />
Rocket.<br />
1 bread roll with plenty of backbone.<br />
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I'm fond of a rasher sandwich. Quite fond indeed.<br />
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A couple of years ago I stumbled upon, in my less than humble opinion, the perfect combination of ingredients to make the best rasher sandwich you will ever eat. It's very simple; White cheddar (not melted), rocket and a bit of mayo on a soft, white, lightly toasted roll.</div>
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I'm not changing my stance on that one inch but today I've taken a slightly different angle on that sandwich and stepped it up a notch. A fairly unhealthy notch. </div>
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I, from time to time, suffer from a brand of hangover that can only be described as 'hollow', both in the physical and psychological sense and I need something all encapsulating to fill that void. Grease and cheese tends to work. </div>
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Rasher sandwiches form an all too significant part of my diet. They're by no means reserved for the aftermaths of heavy sessions, but on occasions such as this they need to be persuaded to go the extra mile by adding just a little more propellant. Propellant in this instance being more cheese, more types of cheese and much more of the staple known as bacon...</div>
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The first step on this journey is to get those rashers into the grill. As this calls for a lot of them I've gone with the streaky ones. 7 of them. With a less weapons grade sandwich I'd tend to go with a lesser amount of regular rashers but that's not what I'm dealing with here.<br />
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Picking the right roll is important. I went with a crustier roll than I normally would just because I knew anything less would disintegrate with the amount of shite that'll be going into this. </div>
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I normally wouldn't put any sauce on one of these sandwiches, I usually use mayonnaise but its purpose is purely for lubrication and not for any added flavour. I've left the mayo in the fridge altogether this time and left the lubricating side of things to something that kinda looks like coleslaw. But it ain't coleslaw. I decided to mix half a tub of cream cheese with a shit load of grated cheddar. I don't know if this is a thing people do but I can certainly live with my decision.<br />
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When the rashers were nearing the top of their game I threw the roll in to give it a bit of a warm....</div>
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...then took a lot of pleasure in lashing on that creamy cheese mess.<br />
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Then the real fun begins...<br />
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A good solid underlay of rashers followed by a carpet of sliced white cheddar cheese.<br />
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And repeat. I can attest that cold, i.e not melted, white cheddar on top of rashers is just about the nicest flavour sensation there is.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1lePjvxuPYJkAjYIy8g2McC4imBbVMpgJC3sRksA47qA1e6tuhUy77wCCs0FSbVoVCtw1VsGB1T24cigALtNGaC74LpEdQYDS2aky28pp3C_CoUsd-O6B-4XaaCsKwP1HCuQYILnHA1Q/s1600/10.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1lePjvxuPYJkAjYIy8g2McC4imBbVMpgJC3sRksA47qA1e6tuhUy77wCCs0FSbVoVCtw1VsGB1T24cigALtNGaC74LpEdQYDS2aky28pp3C_CoUsd-O6B-4XaaCsKwP1HCuQYILnHA1Q/s1600/10.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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A load of rocket goes on the top half of the cheesed up roll and the work is over...<br />
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Just serve it up with a well iced fizzy drink of choice, I recommend a nice rock shandy for this trip...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrUAt3Acl5dxaqCx1QGZVd35K16eLIja1Dm2XcdBltJ9B0kllO3Df2ChTSppb49z7Tf1mrWeZHXSWtfhiKrsUt9SEE5abTR5f4YYdEXEWR5dqeMoqINKPtQmBBL7u2bhyphenhypheniavd3D8XbhOA/s1600/12.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrUAt3Acl5dxaqCx1QGZVd35K16eLIja1Dm2XcdBltJ9B0kllO3Df2ChTSppb49z7Tf1mrWeZHXSWtfhiKrsUt9SEE5abTR5f4YYdEXEWR5dqeMoqINKPtQmBBL7u2bhyphenhypheniavd3D8XbhOA/s1600/12.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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The point of a hangover cure is to provide complete distraction from all of its symptoms. If you've made this right you're entire being should be consumed by the cheese and rasher overload. If you can count backwards from 10 you haven't put enough of something on there. This should hopefully get you to the place you want be before you get that all important nights sleep (the cheese will work wonders in that department too) that with any luck will have you back to your old self the following morning/afternoon.</div>
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Boozey Swine.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-16492635890510657792014-05-19T19:13:00.000+01:002017-04-11T11:58:32.705+01:00Late Night Fast Food: A Plea For Reason and Sanity<div style="text-align: center;">
<b><i>The system is broken and we don't even realise there's a problem.</i></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL12TuH0wAiPo0tB6gJD5raDOK-Fr4ULfhZwvCQqp1cQRfYSQNzq-WCMGfXRVA0EqVh6PBGGuI7or500jlet-5mBzovry3_lTk-T0P22RDZracHSl0w5DZHy6TEV9V96031tnbZSDcX_M/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="177" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL12TuH0wAiPo0tB6gJD5raDOK-Fr4ULfhZwvCQqp1cQRfYSQNzq-WCMGfXRVA0EqVh6PBGGuI7or500jlet-5mBzovry3_lTk-T0P22RDZracHSl0w5DZHy6TEV9V96031tnbZSDcX_M/s1600/photo+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Green to me means go, proceed, etc... This is confusing.</i></div>
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Let me bring something to your attention.<br />
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Two occasions in the last month have made me realise that we can do better as a society.</div>
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The first time was one night when I was walking home at approximately 1.20am, not hungry or looking for a snack, just listening to a few tunes when a car pulled in beside me and in a panicked fashion the driver asked me was there anywhere they would get food. This being a Tuesday or Wednesday night I told them they'd have to make do with whatever they could get from the 24 hour garage. She pleaded "But is there no takeaways open?!?!", my heart sank a little as I had to crush that last little ounce of hope she was clinging to.</div>
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Only one week later I was in a strangely similar predicament, this time I was starving, but I already knew the answer. At least my brain knew, my stomach wanted to believe another story. Leaving work just after 1am, a Wednesday night, I knew there was nowhere open, that 4 packets of crisps and a loaf of whatever bread was left in the 24 hour would be my only solace.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvFamvDpJh9sLltOjYQYle7cxIoeSo5VEKivVE1klt9zk3m6wD5lTGhNHL4sDBWGqxFRmT2H9vlll-AU8CVJy2fsGp2C-6XwF9qWvsvANHoCCAVTlfb_9G90YPRNsBgK6zEaFU77hghIo/s1600/photo+4.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgvFamvDpJh9sLltOjYQYle7cxIoeSo5VEKivVE1klt9zk3m6wD5lTGhNHL4sDBWGqxFRmT2H9vlll-AU8CVJy2fsGp2C-6XwF9qWvsvANHoCCAVTlfb_9G90YPRNsBgK6zEaFU77hghIo/s1600/photo+4.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Crisp sandwiches are exceptionally difficult to construct on the walk home.</i></div>
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But what the gut wants, the gut wants: Fried Chicken. I emerged onto the Main St. to some kind of shit version of Las Vegas. The place lit up like a bonfire of cheap neon.</div>
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I knew the chippers were closed. The chippers knew the chippers were closed. Were they dressed accordingly? Not a chance. If I see lights, I think open for business. Chippers would claim they leave lights on for advertising. It's a sick and twisted act of temptation; shining a light on what you cannot have, illuminating the empty chasm of your stomach.<br />
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Chippers you're doing yourselves absolutely no favours. Here's a simple rule of thumb;<br />
<i style="font-weight: bold;"><br /></i>
<i style="font-weight: bold;">If it's late enough that you're closed, anybody who is out in public wants fast food. </i><br />
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Your brightly lit beacons of disappointment are pissing people off. Nobody sees them and thinks "oh, maybe I'll get food from there tomorrow"...<br />
Their only thought is <b>"Chicken skin. Now"</b>.<br />
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Now I'm not one to go ranting about this seemingly trivial problem without presenting a solution. And my proposed solution is twofold.</div>
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<b><u>1. The Traffic Light System.</u></b></div>
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Chippers want to advertise at all hours of the day and night as is their right and are highly unlikely to change that policy after hearing the ravings of a guy with a nickname like mine. What I propose is a lighting system, just like traffic lights. Green for open. Red for closed. Maybe even an orange light to signal that they're on their last orders and you better get there sharpish. Their name is still illuminated, just in one very clear colour.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL12TuH0wAiPo0tB6gJD5raDOK-Fr4ULfhZwvCQqp1cQRfYSQNzq-WCMGfXRVA0EqVh6PBGGuI7or500jlet-5mBzovry3_lTk-T0P22RDZracHSl0w5DZHy6TEV9V96031tnbZSDcX_M/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="177" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgL12TuH0wAiPo0tB6gJD5raDOK-Fr4ULfhZwvCQqp1cQRfYSQNzq-WCMGfXRVA0EqVh6PBGGuI7or500jlet-5mBzovry3_lTk-T0P22RDZracHSl0w5DZHy6TEV9V96031tnbZSDcX_M/s1600/photo+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Just so we're absolutely clear: THIS IS ALL WRONG.</i></div>
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That solves that problem. If there's a simpler or more rational way to fix this issue I'm all ears.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieA7mcLfdG7sZuLWQnjmBD61xXIp0Rz0fM1Lcex_TQSRYtBNPfMmjNEwVTiiEMp6mum0r06XAPm7H9sG_40-SHucGgwPJfj5ZjL_6XRXV1JVl12CCxX_84pfXKdwfUwRzbeAbJtbLlk8Q/s1600/traffic+light+sauce.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEieA7mcLfdG7sZuLWQnjmBD61xXIp0Rz0fM1Lcex_TQSRYtBNPfMmjNEwVTiiEMp6mum0r06XAPm7H9sG_40-SHucGgwPJfj5ZjL_6XRXV1JVl12CCxX_84pfXKdwfUwRzbeAbJtbLlk8Q/s1600/traffic+light+sauce.JPG" width="298" /></a></div>
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<i>This has no relevence to this story other than it being a tray of sauces that looks like a traffic light.</i></div>
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<b><u>2. Rotating Mandatory Takeaway Opening.</u></b></div>
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Just like pharmacies rotate which ones open late at night or on a Sunday, chippers should be made do the same as a form of service to the people of their respective town. At a quick count, just using Newbridge as an example, I can think of at least 8 takeaways on the Main St. that if they took it on a one week rotating basis they'd each only have to open late (until 7am the next morning, when hot deli counters start opening) about 6 weeks a year. Hike up the prices 10, 20, even 25% to cover staff and security costs, we wouldn't care. The business generated would be minimal, I know, but think of the smile that'd be put on the face of the person coming off the late shift in work who can't face another Pot Noodle sandwich or the happy drunk stumbling home from a few late cans in a mates house who wants the last mile of his journey home to be spent trying to solve the puzzle of how to dip a large battered burger into a tub of curry sauce. It'd bring happiness to the hearts of everyone involved. Again in conjunction with the 'Traffic Light System' identifying which chipper is on the late night opening would be simple. </div>
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Lets not stop the Traffic Light System there though, put it into play within bars and niteclubs for people who, unlike me, aren't so acutely aware of last order times.<br />
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I'm only trying to make this country a better place for all of us. If you agree with what I've said please forward this not only to your local Chippers & Takeaways, but now in this time of elections, send it to your local politicians imploring them to put this system into law where it rightly belongs.<br />
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B.S<br />
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-10955935947741141352014-05-13T22:44:00.000+01:002017-04-11T11:59:32.374+01:00Chocolate, Banana and Raspberry MilkshakeI had a few "Monday Pints? Be Grand" last night. Now while I was far from suffering from a hangover, my tastes were a little off kilter this morning. So after the chicken curry, chicken balls and chips that I had for breakfast I was in the humour for making a milkshake at home. One of the by products of the few pints, while I'm still not conceding it being a symptom of a hangover, was having absolutely zero interest in reading instructions on how to make a milkshake or measuring out the quantities involved...<br />
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So I gathered up what I had....<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8-dvz4pHF1quO66DCi05O0rkBvQyE7dB-UtP6auUXI2RYNx_MN_d4CvApYJboKSZqr-lk3goWAB2tK_RIVj_JZl-RjFsvtCKQ7F9mKjVixJeBsnbfdhewmhh4vS22p0HDpY2lYH7jy0c/s1600/photo+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8-dvz4pHF1quO66DCi05O0rkBvQyE7dB-UtP6auUXI2RYNx_MN_d4CvApYJboKSZqr-lk3goWAB2tK_RIVj_JZl-RjFsvtCKQ7F9mKjVixJeBsnbfdhewmhh4vS22p0HDpY2lYH7jy0c/s1600/photo+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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...and fired 'some' of each into the blender...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP7xslYu9GQWQ9xFQPSFUcGiliU6Qi6Bs04calQTURRxjovFIbzOF_Y8L355hUDh8qSBDIHOXjVes42boL8xC5YZ8xZ7orc-G6-voxvgsM35Rj2VtzC_ldMXoyEWsBQxBX5LHy0LozHJU/s1600/photo+3.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP7xslYu9GQWQ9xFQPSFUcGiliU6Qi6Bs04calQTURRxjovFIbzOF_Y8L355hUDh8qSBDIHOXjVes42boL8xC5YZ8xZ7orc-G6-voxvgsM35Rj2VtzC_ldMXoyEWsBQxBX5LHy0LozHJU/s1600/photo+3.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><i>I've made a terrible mistake.</i></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
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I immediately knew I had put in too much milk so I compensated by upping the ice cream, chocolate and raspberry content. It eventually ended in me adding 3/4 of the entire tub of ice cream to bring it to any sort of a milkshake consistency. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgc9OvAcGNz8j2s49vb_n0IX3TOJQw6v4dEFmqo8duomHhDVAm4yI7l766tMdElhz88Hog7Z9POb7JVEG1Rq4Gwf9xL9Ft19YwzZydKosINHyrj90vK336F38CKXI_GwL0oPHLwtI7B3g/s1600/photo+2.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhgc9OvAcGNz8j2s49vb_n0IX3TOJQw6v4dEFmqo8duomHhDVAm4yI7l766tMdElhz88Hog7Z9POb7JVEG1Rq4Gwf9xL9Ft19YwzZydKosINHyrj90vK336F38CKXI_GwL0oPHLwtI7B3g/s1600/photo+2.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Glass 1...</i></div>
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It was quite nice, considering I had to drink the best part of a litre of the stuff. </div>
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Next time it'll be less milk and I'll be making it later in the evening so I can justify firing a few lashes of Bailey's into it. That'd be the business.<br />
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As a quick aside I've been making a few smoothies lately...<br />
Milk, plain yoghurt, a banana and frozen blueberries. It's a quality drink.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMbq_uQDDhR5hzwvcDJuik1PbBglyOUJRThE9L3h86ovL_eT1SYQOzs6wxzJTOA75_gRWSehQRzv3W5fQvQRQ0GXadxFTuYE_HWJ7UhqOZoq_-PgiJv0k6_LPI3ilfEasapGQmrvTV_cA/s1600/10155197_696328910423972_6904975949306471834_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMbq_uQDDhR5hzwvcDJuik1PbBglyOUJRThE9L3h86ovL_eT1SYQOzs6wxzJTOA75_gRWSehQRzv3W5fQvQRQ0GXadxFTuYE_HWJ7UhqOZoq_-PgiJv0k6_LPI3ilfEasapGQmrvTV_cA/s1600/10155197_696328910423972_6904975949306471834_n.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>A drop of Bacardi will give it a lift if consuming after 6pm. </i></div>
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Now I've tried this lad with a spoon of peanut butter thrown into the mix and while not bad I feel it best to treat peanut butter as you would a fine whiskey, ingested only neat, unsullied by the creations of God or men.</div>
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B.S</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-10565591735989447532014-05-10T15:57:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:12:04.848+01:00'Beans & Peas' Fish and Chips Burger<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcDQ41SmVs1dhtXfrQ4o5TWi-aRwiuKIsiYsG7v3-S-FjXfd7gLW_3EGyRG9AuWGeYNVyU7IPYC2P5epDGT6w7h7KpsAa0qrVZsUCCFqwQu-QeRYPKYrYSq7xRbEJLNsVJtNr8-1Qdfmg/s1600/done.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhcDQ41SmVs1dhtXfrQ4o5TWi-aRwiuKIsiYsG7v3-S-FjXfd7gLW_3EGyRG9AuWGeYNVyU7IPYC2P5epDGT6w7h7KpsAa0qrVZsUCCFqwQu-QeRYPKYrYSq7xRbEJLNsVJtNr8-1Qdfmg/s1600/done.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span id="goog_801671316"></span><span id="goog_801671317"></span>Credit where credit is due; England, you do a fine chip and your near insistence to pair them with mushy peas is one I commend. If only there was a sword and an elderly lady big enough that the entire landmass of your country could be rewarded with an honour, albeit with the usual disregard for health and safety present at these ceremonies, for such a feat...<br />
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I'm just back from a quick midweek visit to Manchester to see that sporting institution that have been inflicting hardship on me for the last year and being that I was in a tender state from the previous weekend I ended up medicating myself with a load of shite food. A lot of which consisted of chips and mushy peas.<br />
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Still in the humour for this brand of shite when I got home and being as predictable as a politician, I thought SANDWICH. Ok, well, I've called this a burger but it's all the bleedin' one.<br />
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I wanted something with a little more kick than just Fish & Chips & Peas in bread though...<br />
I decided to add beans into the mix.<br />
A process which would also answer the question of whether mushy peas and beans would make the absolute world-explodingly amazing combination that I'd always hope they would.<br />
<i>But I was never going with plain beans.</i> <b>I'm too far gone for that shit now.</b> Beans for me have to at least have Tabasco Sauce and cheese mixed through them. I've wasted so much of my bean eating life not eating beans like this that to even think about it brings my mood down. No point crying over plain beans though. I decided to take it up another notch and add scallions to the beans as well.<br />
<b><i>Because SCALLIONS.</i></b><br />
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I went with a bit of Donegal Catch Cod and some skinny French Fries for the main event in the burger and in keeping with the English theme I got some Marks & Spencer's burger buns. I've said it before, they do the best mainstream bread rolls available in Ireland. I used 2 buns for this and tried keeping them from tearing apart, but it in the end it made little difference.</div>
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Clockwise from the top left you can see I loaded on the beans, which were dosed up with about 15 drops of Tabasco Sauce, a quarter block of cheese and 2 finely chopped scallions. A good dose of rocket was put on as a bed for the cod and the other side was given the mushy peas and chips treatment before it was all closed up.<br />
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It goes without saying that you're not going to just stick on about 10 chips for this, and you'll have a load of beans and peas left over so...</div>
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This was good. This could open up a whole new avenue of dirty fish burgers to me. I had contemplated putting some Tabasco or cheese into the peas but having not tested this before I wisely left it to the beans to shoulder that burden and it worked great. I'll super charge mushy peas another day. </div>
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Traditionalists might not agree with my choice of skinny chips but there was method to my madness. Using large hand cut chips in a burger or sandwich doesn't, in my experience, work when there are other ingredients fighting for your attention. <i>The potato is a loud and obnoxious creature, who while having very little to say wants to be heard over everyone else. </i>Small doses are key. </div>
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I've very little to say about beans and mushy peas. They work. It's beautiful to witness. I plan on being the awkward third wheel at many of their future dates. </div>
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All in all I was very impressed; the bread was delicious, I just gave it a little toast so it'd stand up to the pressure, the rocket balanced everything out in a position where I was contemplating a third sauce, but it didn't need that. Scallions first appearance in a beans jersey went very well, a solid performance and definitely one with a bright future in this game. Purists would argue that I should have had a proper chip shop slab of fish but I found the variety I used much more up to the task, great strength and an optimal batter to fish ratio for sandwich use.</div>
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At the end of the day this was a very convincing win. My insides are the only injury but are expected to make a full recovery and be back in light training by Tuesday morning.</div>
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Boozey Swine</div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com31tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-60031738062638659892014-02-27T13:56:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:05:49.599+01:00Hot 'n' Cheesy Scrambled Eggs w/ Garlic Rashers<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXWk7_xlgGry9Tt1FYR4BvELdpXf9_TsvLFuyzeDpM4_rr1ruDYaQpYqWGKioWekhZGmv4riieRQYCAW4NzA3e5ZUq37NyvYqrHHzaVv6DDlUMd2T4DCyVSJONNT0XJs9BmovNfWQ6Tzs/s1600/IMG_7992.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhXWk7_xlgGry9Tt1FYR4BvELdpXf9_TsvLFuyzeDpM4_rr1ruDYaQpYqWGKioWekhZGmv4riieRQYCAW4NzA3e5ZUq37NyvYqrHHzaVv6DDlUMd2T4DCyVSJONNT0XJs9BmovNfWQ6Tzs/s1600/IMG_7992.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I spent the last 3 weeks travelling the four corners of Germany with my band <a href="https://www.facebook.com/knoxvillemorning" target="_blank">Knoxville Morning</a> and with all due love and respect to the wonderful people of that country, they don't, in my humble (and most likely narrow minded) opinion, have a bulls notion about how to prepare a decent breakfast.<br />
We soon gave up on trying to find a morning meal with any semblance of familiarity and resorted to waiting for brunches or lunches from the trusty Turkish Kebab Shops which are in abundance throughout Deutschland. <br />
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After I got home, a couple of days ago, my body was, strangely enough, craving some healthy food which it was almost entirely starved of over the course of our long journey. After a 24 detox consisting of about 2 fields worth of vegetables I was ready to get back on the wagon.<br />
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I woke up this morning craving all the best flavours and I knew I had the ingredients at hand to make something special happen. I wanted bacon and eggs. But I wanted loads of cheese too. I knew I'd garlic and that had to go in there. AND HOT. It had to be hot, but with loads of flavour... Tabasco Sauce was the lad I was after.<br />
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I immediately had a fully formed picture in my mind of what was going to happen. I wasn't sure it would work, but I had the hope and boundless optimism that only a man about to dip his toe into the weekend could have.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmpVE4g77kSN3kJXU9sbuNZrM83iIKjkUA3PUWvG4fllu0tbqKNoiy5xty02OvTCmK7rFUJy8Iu_KZaGlcunmNO4qOI10e_zNAMw9e6btXZjCfLQ_w7peKdKG8QUj5MWsGR2b99rZ4gVY/s1600/IMG_7993.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmpVE4g77kSN3kJXU9sbuNZrM83iIKjkUA3PUWvG4fllu0tbqKNoiy5xty02OvTCmK7rFUJy8Iu_KZaGlcunmNO4qOI10e_zNAMw9e6btXZjCfLQ_w7peKdKG8QUj5MWsGR2b99rZ4gVY/s1600/IMG_7993.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I gathered my ingredients:<br />
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<li>3 Rashers</li>
<li>3 Eggs</li>
<li>A Clove of Garlic</li>
<li>Cheddar Cheese (to be grated)</li>
<li>Creme Fraiche</li>
<li>Tabasco Sauce</li>
<li>Hot Chilli Seasoning</li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB_KBsdaVpaywi1IvpWSYIVPTg-z34jfxo7_fCT_jjSAkRkkdLinWdX8QHTtOqVMhpk6fpNE6Fn0EXEhMOMzoy-4aGMBjsb5SZL0m83OSOZE_bLJarfbOTsjemWX_JcLHeHfEug4SGUQE/s1600/IMG_7994.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB_KBsdaVpaywi1IvpWSYIVPTg-z34jfxo7_fCT_jjSAkRkkdLinWdX8QHTtOqVMhpk6fpNE6Fn0EXEhMOMzoy-4aGMBjsb5SZL0m83OSOZE_bLJarfbOTsjemWX_JcLHeHfEug4SGUQE/s1600/IMG_7994.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I heated up a frying pan with some olive oil and crushed the clove of garlic into it. Then I cut the 3 rashers into strips and fried them up until they were nice and crispy.</div>
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While all this was going on, and I'll spare you the unattractive photos of it, I made the scrambled eggs. Simple.. 3 whisked up eggs into a hot pan with melted butter and stirred constantly. As the eggs were just about cooked I added a handful of grated cheddar cheese and a couple of teaspoons of creme fraiche and stirred them through until they melted.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhP0V5rWTGHikvB_XuVuGL58fbHcwwzZKP3xvVuXZlfaOZyH5qCn5t9OWENw2AHTQm3hcx1fjjYC0Clt_m56hKDOBt2Xh7PJKjpUKmvCl2gXEkV2abAXX7dKFTKf-oaChtJfOvewhhQ0YQ/s1600/IMG_7992.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhP0V5rWTGHikvB_XuVuGL58fbHcwwzZKP3xvVuXZlfaOZyH5qCn5t9OWENw2AHTQm3hcx1fjjYC0Clt_m56hKDOBt2Xh7PJKjpUKmvCl2gXEkV2abAXX7dKFTKf-oaChtJfOvewhhQ0YQ/s1600/IMG_7992.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Serve it up in a bowl like so, sprinkle some chilli seasoning and drizzle some Tabasco sauce over the eggs and your done.</i></div>
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This was the nicest, tastiest, most satisfying breakfast I've had in as long as I can remember. I've often added some grated cheese to scrambled eggs but the addition of creme fraiche knocks it up about 5 more levels, they were the creamiest most delicious eggs I've ever had, and it all worked perfectly with the little kick of the chilli and tabasco. </div>
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The balance was perfect. </div>
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Now the rashers and garlic combo... I don't know why this isn't more mainstream, maybe for the fact you can rule out getting a shift any time in the near future if you consume this, but I can tell you it'll be well worth it.</div>
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<i>Spectacular</i> is the only word for the explosion of flavours going on throughout this dish. </div>
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This whole endeavour only took 10 minutes to make and about 40 seconds to eat. </div>
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I think for Lent I'll give up eating anything other than this for breakfast.</div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
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B.S. x</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-72697633278347723782013-12-20T15:44:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:07:22.261+01:00The Sausage, Egg and Cheese Cure.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFCgDNPT-2aK438dtVrqK0DMsChFsEmXIZTbOnYZXurdfI_npzrbkBSpQQOSn9xfNUwbWNZMRObTGbZ9_GwBJqs1Y6CwfsfOz_DFXTxB8WqFit5Opy16hEtmkPlnFLSfzOilBzNVc6F0U/s1600/IMG_7243.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhFCgDNPT-2aK438dtVrqK0DMsChFsEmXIZTbOnYZXurdfI_npzrbkBSpQQOSn9xfNUwbWNZMRObTGbZ9_GwBJqs1Y6CwfsfOz_DFXTxB8WqFit5Opy16hEtmkPlnFLSfzOilBzNVc6F0U/s400/IMG_7243.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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After I'd spent about 6 solid hours trying to quench the indigestion that was brought on from a skelp of pints topped off with a 24 hour garage 'Salad' sandwich (duly stuffed with a packet of crisps), my weary body informed me that sausage sandwiches would be the requirement of the afternoon.<br />
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I'm fussy of late when it comes to sausages, I like the good quality ones but none of those apple or red wine infused excuses, I've yet to meet one of them I can get on with. There's no need for that messing. For this I used plain Nolan's (of Kilcullen, Co.Kildare, naturally) Sausages. They're the business. Cue roars of "Have you not tried Superquinn sausages?!?" Yes I have. Settle down, they're lovely. They're like Willie Nelson, Michael Collins and The 2nd (Bale) Batman movie all rolled into one. But they're a little hard to come by in my part of the world, and until I put them side by side and am proved differently I'll argue that Nolan's are just as good. End of.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyitY428fOMDFn4XiJdhH96OXIyyGzHE2yPkuTWt4Z5bXcufxTRqNiPqZkNAAw07UqqWVJ39RlMhKiPobw3XSTXD8epqQsJsnGpCXM9ZZVU8E8VdDZa3OvitxOakI9MME59HPl3UPDf2E/s1600/IMG_7240.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyitY428fOMDFn4XiJdhH96OXIyyGzHE2yPkuTWt4Z5bXcufxTRqNiPqZkNAAw07UqqWVJ39RlMhKiPobw3XSTXD8epqQsJsnGpCXM9ZZVU8E8VdDZa3OvitxOakI9MME59HPl3UPDf2E/s400/IMG_7240.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Fry up them sausages, like a good lad!</i></div>
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I hadn't planned on on this particular variety of sausage sandwich, which on appearances might appear to be a homage to an item Mickey D's pedal on their breakfast menu (with the manky rubber egg disc thing), but Easi Singles were on a special offer and well, what are you gonna do? At first I wasn't going to risk an egg in this too, but sure fuck it, it's Christmas, may as well.<br />
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I'd seriously advise not going for a higher class of cheese in this beast, melted processed cheese and good sausage meat together is, if you haven't already tasted it, aces.</div>
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<i>One and a half slices on each. Cover every inch. No Fear.</i></div>
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Right, with your sausages nearly done, toast a couple of slices of bread then cover them in cheese slices and slide them under a grill for a few minutes till the cheese starts to bubble and gets that nice, enticing, plasticy, cling film sheen that makes you question whether you unwrapped the cheese in the first place.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGif9glCGd-3GI7nlbEHQua_7HO23URgpLn7ibjQsVGELsztsZBN6CNwPIRd3YHSRYsW1IxIWbvcfB59f6LoHNBE5u2aH3eggUl8EblsSDa7u0yU85CWWBZUqevhXEsgR1PSmQQV-GNZY/s1600/IMG_7242.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGif9glCGd-3GI7nlbEHQua_7HO23URgpLn7ibjQsVGELsztsZBN6CNwPIRd3YHSRYsW1IxIWbvcfB59f6LoHNBE5u2aH3eggUl8EblsSDa7u0yU85CWWBZUqevhXEsgR1PSmQQV-GNZY/s400/IMG_7242.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Yes, I did take a bite out of a sausage before it went into the sandwich.</i> </div>
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This is where you have to take a little care. Everything needs to be hot, but, crucially, not boiling hot. Don't be afraid to let the toast sit out for a couple of minutes, that cheese needs to cool a good bit from its molten level before it hits your mouth. A burned mouth is very uncool, pun intended. It's best to only fry the egg only when the cheesy toast is out and cooling down, you want the egg landing on the sandwich straight from the pan so it's as fresh as possible. Lash the sausages on one side, the fried egg the other. Close it up and you're away. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZa4p9hj4Vv5oEbAy5G_w8qtoqxzxU33HXIcKfLW6_tV23FSiso3SW4WrDgsH1nfpYd6t0m6ho385oZvBR2z7P_YsYrD46JuDbPxIOz-Wk0qWH-QYB5x3qjTtr6mJCKvF_bjiADlsgeKY/s1600/IMG_7239.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZa4p9hj4Vv5oEbAy5G_w8qtoqxzxU33HXIcKfLW6_tV23FSiso3SW4WrDgsH1nfpYd6t0m6ho385oZvBR2z7P_YsYrD46JuDbPxIOz-Wk0qWH-QYB5x3qjTtr6mJCKvF_bjiADlsgeKY/s400/IMG_7239.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>Like I always say, "an egg yoke the consistency of a nose bleed is what you're after"</i></div>
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Give it another minute, there's no rush, let the cheese get to know the sausage and egg before its timely end.<br />
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Dig in and savour it. It's delicious. <i>Rich</i> is the word here. A really rich flavour, the gooey cheese mingling in with the sausages in a not unromantic fashion, just beautiful. And the egg? It's like an extra 10 euro credit, topping up the richness level. The boring white part joining forces with the gluey melted cheese to form an amazing taste and texture. It's a party.</div>
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Now at some point you will get the distinct feeling that maybe you've "gone a little too far, this time". Don't mind those thoughts, it's only The Fear trying to put the spooks up you. You finish this sandwich and you'll finish The Fear, for the day anyway. </div>
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I tested this in my normal capacity by immediately making and eating a second one just in case the first was a fluke or if I was just letting my emotions get the better of me. It wasn't and I wasn't. Don't eat one (or two) of these on a work day, there'll be no 'joie de vivre' to take on the world after this. You'll be resigned to the couch for the day with a 2 litre bottle of fizzy drink and a large Turkish Delight, but it'll be some day.</div>
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For more of this brand of shite on a more frequent basis like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a>, you'll feel all the better for it.</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-68253196397718004962013-10-21T23:41:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:08:39.875+01:00Beans à la BoozeyBeing absolutely devoid of the energy it would of taken to drag myself across the road to the shop this afternoon I was utterly relieved to find both bread and beans in the house so worst case scenario I wasn't going to starve or (even worse) have to resort to weetabix.<br />
Feeling a little fancy and having been given the advice a couple of years ago that beans were something you could "fuck absolutely anything into" to make them better I decided <i>I deserved better</i> and so would test this theory out.<br />
With what, at first, seemed to be limited resources at my disposal I managed to find a shallot (a red onion that went to Newbridge College), cheese (red and white cheddar), a couple of rashers and some black pepper, cayenne chilli pepper and chilli flakes to give it a bit of life. We were doing ok. <i>We. Were. Doing. O.K. </i><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja0PE3ZtRBTfIfsvc1u6nMx_CC7Vj0YSqz13RbQHltBlbAqeVL8zoGMFHgPTosAd_XMGJeSCmE626GdGs7zL7z0ecBE6yjKnaVb7N0vto0bhe1_AqOEUPINfyBhEZBuRY9uxE06vj4DEI/s1600/beans+before.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEja0PE3ZtRBTfIfsvc1u6nMx_CC7Vj0YSqz13RbQHltBlbAqeVL8zoGMFHgPTosAd_XMGJeSCmE626GdGs7zL7z0ecBE6yjKnaVb7N0vto0bhe1_AqOEUPINfyBhEZBuRY9uxE06vj4DEI/s400/beans+before.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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I started this adventure by sticking a couple of rashers under the grill and throwing the beans into a saucepan. I initially thought I may have been a little hasty with the beans as they heated up very quickly but I turned the heat down and let them simmer which made them really tender and soft and actually worked really well with this concoction. I chopped up the shallot and fried it in some olive oil. Well more accurately I burned it in some olive oil, I don't worry about things like that though, it was grand.<br />
With the rashers crisping up nicely under the grill I stirred in a mix of red and white cheddar (if this wasn't in the house an easy single would have been going in) along with the slightly over done shallot and a good dose of the chilli's and pepper. Next I finely chopped up one of the rashers and stirred it in too and transferred the lot into a bowl and topped it all off with some more grated cheese and the other rasher which I cut into strips.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTq8aKJtsPqUXwPMXNeSekOB4YWm_BxcOlZtq89BSzWc0UC5HfcdALOZlEHSS5JBTZk3TMg-9F97hdFPFX8sGYRWQS38WT9XTr-4mXSDJkTjopfaMbbfTRs9K9iPvFSldzCS3Gxzam2RE/s1600/beans.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="375" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTq8aKJtsPqUXwPMXNeSekOB4YWm_BxcOlZtq89BSzWc0UC5HfcdALOZlEHSS5JBTZk3TMg-9F97hdFPFX8sGYRWQS38WT9XTr-4mXSDJkTjopfaMbbfTRs9K9iPvFSldzCS3Gxzam2RE/s400/beans.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<b><i>Mega.</i></b></div>
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Not that I have any problem with regular beans on toast, I love the stuff, but the substance I tasted couldn't have tasted further from them. With a very small bit of effort and few basic ingredients (a regular onion will do in place of the shallot) a simple tin of beans can be turned into an absolutely spectacular meal (The flavour of the crisped up fat from the rashers hitting you every couple of bites is unreal). I ate this with 4 or 5 slices of well buttered brown toast and the belly was well and truly happy and content for the rest of the day. </div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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B.S </div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-52900126126364573212013-09-03T16:07:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:09:09.747+01:00Tangle Twister Daiquiri<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjosF3s_TJAmm5A7Gyx4WxB66vxot3aS4PZI6Ws81uy7RyjL-hHzVadjE6g3z63xBwKkjTX84Mu4x3pdwPTZIqXy2TCKeeNVwvPY16E54b6ZYbPd9ZLt5cwaSecn6SXESt1w1P8HZfibbc/s1600/1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjosF3s_TJAmm5A7Gyx4WxB66vxot3aS4PZI6Ws81uy7RyjL-hHzVadjE6g3z63xBwKkjTX84Mu4x3pdwPTZIqXy2TCKeeNVwvPY16E54b6ZYbPd9ZLt5cwaSecn6SXESt1w1P8HZfibbc/s400/1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Let's skip the bit where I analyse my life and point out how a man of my age needs to get a drivers licence, tax, insurance, a mortgage, a strimmer, an Xtra-vision card and a collection of hobbies that don't involve making alcoholic versions of my favourite childhood ice pops. Those boats have sailed. When I'm faced with a Monday evening on my own in early September in a landlocked county in Ireland this is the type of shit that's gonna go down. <br />
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Tangle Twisters.<br />
I won't now, never have and may God strike me down if I ever do drop the 'Tangle' from this, the most wonderful Twister, as much as HB would like me, and the rest of us, to. Because, by Jaysus, you'll be fairly Tangled after this Twister I can tell you. Ha... Haha.. No?.. Sorry, I've drink in me.<br />
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I'd been thinking about my next cocktail move after my <a href="http://www.theboozeyswine.com/2013/07/jagerbomb-ice-cream.html" target="_blank">Jägerbomb Ice Cream</a> and decided that instead of ice creaming up a drink, I'd alcohol up an ice cream. If you get me? You do. Grand. We'll move on.<br />
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Well we'll move back a little bit first I suppose, a bit of history...<br />
I first encountered a Daiquiri, a strawberry one to be exact, while on a skiing trip with my friends Ciarán and Rob in New Hampshire in late 2005. We were staying in a motel 5 miles from the middle of fuck all and quickly realised the place up the road, <a href="http://indianheadresort.com/" target="_blank">The Indian Head</a>, had much better facilities than the ones we were living in. Every night after we'd left the slopes (the variety of slopes I was sticking to weren't unlike those of <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Curragh" target="_blank">The Curragh Plains</a>) we'd head up the road to The Head, shoot some pool (as they say in The States), drink beer and inevitably I'd get the notion to get a cocktail.<br />
Even though this was the time of the Celtic Tiger and we were all going around wiping our arses with pesto laden half pounders and lighting our farts with tenners, Strawberry Daiquiris weren't the everyday feature of the Irish pub/club cocktail menu that they are now. This was all brand new to me and I was in love, I didn't care that they weren't cool or manly, I wanted an alcoholic slush puppy to go with the bottle of piss American beer I was thoroughly enjoying.<br />
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Which brings me back (or forward, I'm remarkably confused) to the Tangle Twister. A tube of frozen Strawberry (the best fruit) spectacularness, wrapped in a load of pineapple (the 2nd best fruit) ice cream and pear (the somewhere between 3rd and 7th best fruit, my ranking system is in its early days) icepop.<br />
Every ingredient here is a prime candidate for daiquiri-ing.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOhO4FvwcnbKzhAY55QR3m1XXGXNWJGKoZVgJVkF68yYzURXXRl9rm-Dx-KoUfgTVt7XLzJNDbdRMudPks_n3YblLE1G4C8-Exa6aUJNU7BmVDIsz3Wc8fye9qIOtHjQZtFM5kRVc-jzU/s1600/2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="298" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgOhO4FvwcnbKzhAY55QR3m1XXGXNWJGKoZVgJVkF68yYzURXXRl9rm-Dx-KoUfgTVt7XLzJNDbdRMudPks_n3YblLE1G4C8-Exa6aUJNU7BmVDIsz3Wc8fye9qIOtHjQZtFM5kRVc-jzU/s400/2.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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After much thought and consideration I decided this set of ingredients and tools would serve me best; fresh strawberries, tinned pears and pineapples(just to avoid the hardship of pealing those pricks), a hand blender and a few other bits. And of course the obligatory Rum.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy9keV5KAI0ma8Zw6O6RaPJcqogObCBfr0nw7VVoIoLH3UCgGInAVpAsm1_fdUYejfYO9eK5b8s9ZU0cQ8-6jUhLjonO_1C6hF245koPOy-2rWo82PjsFknw_JkOnAu5Idq9tsvFyVo1E/s1600/3.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy9keV5KAI0ma8Zw6O6RaPJcqogObCBfr0nw7VVoIoLH3UCgGInAVpAsm1_fdUYejfYO9eK5b8s9ZU0cQ8-6jUhLjonO_1C6hF245koPOy-2rWo82PjsFknw_JkOnAu5Idq9tsvFyVo1E/s400/3.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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The first thing I did was pour a large rum and coke just to make sure the Bacardi hadn't gone off, it hadn't, then I trimmed the hedges off most of the strawberries and threw them into the blender.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_ny-0zPWxgeEYpgeH4lyjqTsW6mau3h-bb2d34HZudZBS77Daywgf9Bqx2uOTJkg4xIJSJr6QUl_vWnGFHeemNZylp_7zsHmalpttHb0H74sz-BpLJtLZc3SFg0MFdzUELFAqC4U5ukM/s1600/4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj_ny-0zPWxgeEYpgeH4lyjqTsW6mau3h-bb2d34HZudZBS77Daywgf9Bqx2uOTJkg4xIJSJr6QUl_vWnGFHeemNZylp_7zsHmalpttHb0H74sz-BpLJtLZc3SFg0MFdzUELFAqC4U5ukM/s400/4.jpg" width="297" /></a></div>
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I topped them off with some caster sugar and 3 measures of Bacardi rum (that may have been excessive) and blended it all up till it looked like something you'd find in a butchers drain.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMKUEonc3NR96YlOwr2Nj_tX9dRKmLPXTVp0zvSsxt0FX4td-ZEq0xyx_h6bqnZiDRESc3pcL1FAX8ZJRmtzZYYk1_wj0JtgX3PO_hD9Mye6VcZAnIqm5icxkEyyBvPukNydQ6x-w6DnU/s1600/5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMKUEonc3NR96YlOwr2Nj_tX9dRKmLPXTVp0zvSsxt0FX4td-ZEq0xyx_h6bqnZiDRESc3pcL1FAX8ZJRmtzZYYk1_wj0JtgX3PO_hD9Mye6VcZAnIqm5icxkEyyBvPukNydQ6x-w6DnU/s400/5.jpg" width="392" /></a></div>
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<i>Nice.</i></div>
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Contents poured into a plastic container and ready for freezing I moved on to the pear tangle.<br />
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This time into the blender went a couple of tinned pear halves (with some juice), a fair aul swig of a decent pear cider, 2 measures of rum, another dose of sugar and a lob of green food colouring to bring it up to a shade that would bring a tear of joy to Derek Warfield's eye.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjorwyemjgeihLFxJVuK8PMDRSZFKWtoAiexY4TMStCqxZqH6K6RiOIYhro4jWbm07-i-DmcvM2wWwiH9Ad5ZZIV1nlikyHbimnopnxYWoT9qSjEn4Z-vANSjG8R5p73qubpFyo1DS7vDA/s1600/7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjorwyemjgeihLFxJVuK8PMDRSZFKWtoAiexY4TMStCqxZqH6K6RiOIYhro4jWbm07-i-DmcvM2wWwiH9Ad5ZZIV1nlikyHbimnopnxYWoT9qSjEn4Z-vANSjG8R5p73qubpFyo1DS7vDA/s400/7.jpg" width="297" /></a></div>
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Do as with the strawberry solution...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia7hJkc6apiOJo3rqgFGzqks8Eh0dV13Cz4QJzuqg8b7b4ipU5ZUxFy3oiJHjIC5VOffYTZfw2ZDM4mbiNU8smbIcs7iYaRNCzSmO9UMGIBFrWGA7IXGbZWrQpvGmVt06i2Xn50Pcs3EA/s1600/8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEia7hJkc6apiOJo3rqgFGzqks8Eh0dV13Cz4QJzuqg8b7b4ipU5ZUxFy3oiJHjIC5VOffYTZfw2ZDM4mbiNU8smbIcs7iYaRNCzSmO9UMGIBFrWGA7IXGbZWrQpvGmVt06i2Xn50Pcs3EA/s400/8.jpg" width="380" /></a></div>
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The next job is is to make some soft serve pineapple ice cream. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO2WXrwNSQFrJzcuB4TGiw5_DeVRgO6MIcejGwwppPN3GdXQHQ5znk-Cx1z1gnDSZz8a_8MaSs7KPqwoj_GdvQg76LWnGbAozKdjMuMAFJSJ4HqLx9obIWZj1uSDdLE3JtmquDskmV2zc/s1600/9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhO2WXrwNSQFrJzcuB4TGiw5_DeVRgO6MIcejGwwppPN3GdXQHQ5znk-Cx1z1gnDSZz8a_8MaSs7KPqwoj_GdvQg76LWnGbAozKdjMuMAFJSJ4HqLx9obIWZj1uSDdLE3JtmquDskmV2zc/s400/9.jpg" width="297" /></a></div>
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I let some vanilla ice cream melt a bit then I added in 3 rings of tinned pineapple along with some of the juice (I had planned to buy some cream for this part but I got distracted in the shop), then I thought I might as well fire a couple of measures of rum into the ice cream as well because, sure, you know, fuck it, we're partying now lads.</div>
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<i>I should mention that I tasted everything immediately after blending to see if I got the balance of ingredients right. More rum was the general consensus. </i></div>
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Now in the interest of "waste not, want not" I decided to soak some of the remaining fruit in a combination of rum and pear cider for a little while.</div>
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I then drained off the excess alcohol and put the 4 containers in the freezer for a couple of hours...</div>
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The excess fruity cider rum combo I drained off from the fruit made a nice little appetizer for the main event / reward for all my hard work thus far...</div>
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I sipped away on this along with most of a bottle of cider and a rum and coke and the following 2 hours passed by in what seemed like a flash...</div>
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I got lucky with the timing, they were solid but hadn't turned into cement-like blocks of ice. I gave each 10 seconds in the microwave and they were easy to mush up with a spoon without going too watery.</div>
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I used one of these icing syringes (which I duly broke in the process) to dispense the ice cream layers. </div>
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The pear and strawberry layers were layered in with a spoon.</div>
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Serve with a side of rum and cider infused frozen fruit and you're all set. Spoon or straw, it's your choice. Not suitable for children or adults with any responsibilities... Each of these contained about 3 and a half shots of rum not including the alcohol suspended in the veins of the frozen fruit, the double measure in the coke, the majority of the large bottle of cider and the rum/cider/fruit juice bonus cocktail... so be careful, no driving, don't even watch a Fast and Furious film after this. </div>
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Good Night.</div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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B.S.</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-46968985636902715522013-08-13T01:07:00.001+01:002017-04-11T12:11:28.137+01:00The Boozey Swine Signature Range: The Manhattan Melt<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I'm delighted to be working with<a href="https://www.facebook.com/judgeroybeansireland" target="_blank"> Judge Roy Beans</a> to create "The Boozey Swine Signature Range". JRB's has long been a favourite establishment of mine for a bit of foundation before a night out as well as a delicious and comforting cure as the dust settles the next day and I'm very happy to align my, frankly terrible, name with a restaurant known for their consistent quality and high standards.<br />
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The first item (update 2017 - most likely last) we'll be bringing to you is 'The Manhattan Melt' (well done to Conal Dolan for winning the naming competition; I've melted many a time in Manhattan, both literally and figuratively), a ciabatta roll stuffed with mince infused with peppers, onions and jalapeños topped with melted cheese, cool guacamole and tomato along with a few other secret ingredients.<br />
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I've taken inspiration from a number of different sandwiches I've had in America over the years for this one and I've added a couple of twists of my own, hopefully bringing something that is out of the ordinary to what you'd usually find in Ireland. The guacamole and mince add a bit of a different (and scrumptious) dimension to what you'd usually find inside a ciabatta... Make full and considered use of your napkin on this fella as he's a messy one.<br />
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By the way I'd also like to draw attention to the side of coleslaw and onion straws. These two items eaten together in the same mouthful. Best thing ever. Simple as that.</div>
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Order it up with a nice beer or if you're feeling fancy, a cocktail. I was always a man who was terrible fond of the Strawberry Daiquiri's but since I've tasted the Solero cocktail the daiquiri has fallen into the silver medal position if I'm to be honest.</div>
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Oh and to accommodate the typical Irish fashion of ordering items by anything other than what they are actually called, if you order a "Boozey sandwich", "a Boozey meltdown", "One of them Boozey yokes" or something even remotely similar like I've already heard numerous reports of, the staff will be kind enough to oblige you and be most polite in correcting your grevious error.<br />
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Many Thanks<br />
The Booze<br />
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All photos by Stephen Connelly. 'The Boozey Swine Signature Range' and 'The Manhattan Melt' graphic by Joe Butler @ <a href="https://www.facebook.com/pages/Film13ltd/102900209907939?fref=ts" target="_blank">Film 13 Ltd</a><br />
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-7867836842770857942013-07-03T22:11:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:11:53.060+01:00Boozey Booze: Jägerbomb Ice Cream<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Epiphany</b> -<i> A moment of great or sudden revelation.</i></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I had one of those the other night. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It had been in the spare bedroom of my mind for some time to incorporate Jägermeister with ice cream when I realised there'll probably be very few days left this summer to enjoy such a treat. I asked myself how I could do this and like a flash this appeared in my mind. There's no explanation for it. The fully formed idea was just there all of a sudden. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><i>Like a gift from the God of drink.</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I'll be blatantly honest and also give away the ending while I'm at it. I had zero hope for this working out. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I was wrong. This is what I want to be remembered for. <i>It's that good.<b> </b></i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Right here is my gift to humanity.</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">No hidden ingredients in this one, just Jägermeister, Red Bull and Vanilla Ice Cream.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The trick is freezing the can of Red Bull. It'll take a while but it's worth it. Just pour it into a plastic (microwavable) container and stick in in the freezer for a few hours. I honestly don't know how long it takes, I put mine in the freezer at 9.30pm, retreated to the boozer, returned home at 1.30am and it was done. It is a bit of a pain but theoretically you could fill a few unused freezer drawers with mounds of these things... That'd be a beautiful sight. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqHL_OzBzhn9lXtxVFOsQE-y_9uc4z61Y95jQ2oRGfRSlo73M9Tv9akli01CZTYq7e4e2uiQeXu9Yf4PprfuYw2ztud5g9MjFIGnrmF6DrxcB-iW7rOTOCuJ6aWN6QoYJfNkzPoYvygwc/s1200/IMG_5868.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqHL_OzBzhn9lXtxVFOsQE-y_9uc4z61Y95jQ2oRGfRSlo73M9Tv9akli01CZTYq7e4e2uiQeXu9Yf4PprfuYw2ztud5g9MjFIGnrmF6DrxcB-iW7rOTOCuJ6aWN6QoYJfNkzPoYvygwc/s320/IMG_5868.jpg" width="238" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Next trick... give the solid block 10 or 15 seconds in the microwave and you've got this wonderful Red Bull slush.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOPnCYNHbnlZywDT4CGEtzuWRTlZlEzEh49LFDIV-_knsQaS2q21fCN2XNvZexkvr5WnvWsOyZZuCWa3mv_wChxnU0Ni2UZm7JFCsB2VgN7XG30zJmsiBVjW2efvTo2cjVAIRKWeRYIyc/s1200/IMG_5869.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOPnCYNHbnlZywDT4CGEtzuWRTlZlEzEh49LFDIV-_knsQaS2q21fCN2XNvZexkvr5WnvWsOyZZuCWa3mv_wChxnU0Ni2UZm7JFCsB2VgN7XG30zJmsiBVjW2efvTo2cjVAIRKWeRYIyc/s320/IMG_5869.jpg" width="238" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Fill the necessary amount of glasses halfway with the icey slush, you'll get about 3 servings out of a standard can and a 100ml Jäger bottle. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji7_S6MLpMSQYQD3wmc4xX_7gpZ0-2fy7tIvGSNJieS03DPjXEM8fcufZD3TpcXtB6qm8tFpcPd8OO1dBx8QRLo7jzfzYidJG6I6K9AjmhbnLFkZzNPskWDt5Sh2CxO9ZJycv7Op0SUak/s1200/IMG_5878.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEji7_S6MLpMSQYQD3wmc4xX_7gpZ0-2fy7tIvGSNJieS03DPjXEM8fcufZD3TpcXtB6qm8tFpcPd8OO1dBx8QRLo7jzfzYidJG6I6K9AjmhbnLFkZzNPskWDt5Sh2CxO9ZJycv7Op0SUak/s320/IMG_5878.jpg" width="238" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Throw in a scoop of ice cream (I blasted the ice cream for 20 seconds in the microwave to soften it up a bit) then drizzle over a shot of Jägermeister.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim0RpNT33lX00-ABh4UZ2HQLbwsSthqYDbX7kGZwAB-yFez93dK1-rJLmWtWUieI5WBO9vFZjOz-1W8BUuMZcbpIYD8A_9n6ldRgt9QyHYvYFr48aQkiVaVIGWSzGB-rluYqNDBeH3pGw/s1200/IMG_5879.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEim0RpNT33lX00-ABh4UZ2HQLbwsSthqYDbX7kGZwAB-yFez93dK1-rJLmWtWUieI5WBO9vFZjOz-1W8BUuMZcbpIYD8A_9n6ldRgt9QyHYvYFr48aQkiVaVIGWSzGB-rluYqNDBeH3pGw/s320/IMG_5879.jpg" width="238" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Stick in a spoon and a couple of straws, mixed it around a bit, then lose your fucking mind when you taste how unbelievably delicious this is. The creaminess of the ice cream works so bloody well with the Jägerbomb taste. It's an absolute delight.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Go. Now. <b><u>MAKE THIS AT HOME!!</u></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You're welcome</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The Boozey Swine.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-67365848279170103222013-07-02T11:07:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:04:29.170+01:00Hangover Hazard: Shit At Shopping.If I'm feeling a little rough on a Sunday evening I generally tackle the problem with a phone call to any one of a number of local businesses who are well stocked in either the curry or garlic sauce department...<br />
Regardless of the state I'm in on a Monday I'll generally go to the shops and buy a few bits for the dinner... Just to get out of the house, like. On an all too regular basis, especially when the cursed horrors still have a tight grip on my emotions, I come home with absolutely nothing of significant value, nutritional or otherwise.<br />
Case in point: Last Monday.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgY7_2Qx3TNT5yQOtFOf6DtHLR5rRxnWL2jPPDKRVmClu_8-JlONof2mUcyBejVt_Y92TWgqZ2DW-R4mdt1u21YW26TINrp_rI19SSVDKnNvEkDwT_EUz1G3jsaYg3a74qa5FOyKuoCmWM/s1200/IMG_5632.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="297" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgY7_2Qx3TNT5yQOtFOf6DtHLR5rRxnWL2jPPDKRVmClu_8-JlONof2mUcyBejVt_Y92TWgqZ2DW-R4mdt1u21YW26TINrp_rI19SSVDKnNvEkDwT_EUz1G3jsaYg3a74qa5FOyKuoCmWM/s400/IMG_5632.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<ul>
<li style="text-align: left;">Wraps </li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Cream cheese (I had the above regular cheese already, luckily enough) </li>
<li style="text-align: left;">Crispy onion bits </li>
<li style="text-align: left;">6 packets of crisps </li>
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<b>That. was. fucking. it.</b></div>
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I'm not a young lad any more friends, this shit ain't excusable. The old brain cells really did hop on the mitch on this occasion. Although that being said, it is one of my ambitions to go on <b>Ready Steady Cook</b> with such an assortment of shite.</div>
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I decided to suffer on and make the most of this misspent (both time <i>and</i> money) endeavour and form the ingredients into some kind of super cheese & onion crisp sandwich that's wrapped in something that if I'd ever seen one as a child (a tortilla wrap in 80's Ireland?) I'd have presumed <i>was </i>a giant crisp (or possibly one of those big holy communions).<br />
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On the left you'll see I've slathered on some cream cheese with wild abondon, sprinkled it amorously with grated cheese then beautified the whole lot with crispy onion bits.<br />
Sorry, I went a bit Nigella on that last sentence, moving on...<br />
On the right is the result of 20 or 30 seconds in the microwave (it could have been a minute or 2 in the oven, I tried both ways with similar results).<br />
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Next I crushed up a bag of Walkers C & O and threw them on top. If you're using another brand you might only need half a bag but since the actual precise scientific measurement for how many crisps are in a bag of Walkers is 'Fuck All' I used a full bag.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIwSHlRD1FG7tg_XMyyJBeqP1EyoNxDGEZ78b71gA9YGSR5R64CscyOImXXp9tPSKEbj5pVymLwZZV1m3LBJNGOwzdJIz6YqSXbYR2dTo3CzO7jl7t0XonfjM4X5h_-Q9RSCi0_RdjBbA/s900/IMG_5645.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIwSHlRD1FG7tg_XMyyJBeqP1EyoNxDGEZ78b71gA9YGSR5R64CscyOImXXp9tPSKEbj5pVymLwZZV1m3LBJNGOwzdJIz6YqSXbYR2dTo3CzO7jl7t0XonfjM4X5h_-Q9RSCi0_RdjBbA/s400/IMG_5645.jpg" width="297" /></a></div>
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That's it, wrap it up. There's no way of making this look any more wholesome than it is. You could garnish it with 20 Major if you wanted to quickly double the nutritional value though.</div>
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There's no easy way to describe eating this. I suppose the overriding emotion I felt was shame...</div>
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There's no supposing. It was shame. <i>SHAME.</i></div>
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The tastes were all familiar, yet, never before had they been presented to my tongue without being backed up with something you could class as food. I immediately felt a hollowness in my stomach, not that I was going to get sick, more of a <i>'what the fuck are you doing to us'</i> vibe. It tasted fine,I suppose, there was not one part that stood out as offensive, yet all together, offended was exactly how it felt. I made a second one just to be sure.</div>
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My mood was <i>unusual</i> for the rest of the night. </div>
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I thought I'd look back at this 'cheese & onion crisps with cheeses and onions inside a thing that looks like a giant crisp' thing and laugh. I haven't yet and don't expect to any time soon. I'm not proud of what I've done. This isn't a blog post so much as it is an exercise in self inflicted public humiliation with the hopes that it won't be repeated again by you or me. </div>
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Do not try this at home.</div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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B.Swine</div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-32357132240773986482013-06-17T00:38:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:03:27.610+01:00The KC Special<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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I was asked last week to be a guest on <a href="http://www.todayfm.com/Shows/Weekdays/KC/KCBlog.aspx" target="_blank">The KC Show</a> on Today FM during their broadcast from the 'Taste of Dublin' festival. The premise was simple: Be interviewed on national radio and in front of a live audience at a posh food festival full of internationally renowned chefs about this absolute car crash of a blog and then make a sandwich for one of my hero's, Damien Dempsey.<br />
No Problem. Want me to do it as gaeilge and with a bag of spiders in my pocket as well lads?<br />
After I'd spent a couple of nights trying to settle the nerves by looking after my local publican's next mortgage payment it became apparent that I'd have no choice but to make a sandwich which would be curing the hollow feelings in my belly and soul. I worked off the principal that it had to be utterly distracting, that your mind would have no choice but to be completely taken over by the collection of tastes, flavours and textures, and thus away from that bastard of a hangover. I had to cover all bases but not overdo it at the same time; it may look to the cynical eye that I've just made a mess of a sandwich by firing everything I could think of into it but that is most definitely not the case. Everything here serves a purpose.<br />
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I'll get straight to the extensive list of ingredients used to make one of these fella's.<br />
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<ul>
<li>Soft White Sub Rolls (I used Marks & Spencer ones, how very rich of me)</li>
<li>Mayonnaise</li>
<li>Mustard (Colman's English) </li>
<li>White Cheedar Cheese (Kilmeaden Light Green or Purple block is best)</li>
<li>Tomato</li>
<li>Rocket</li>
<li>Scallion</li>
<li>Coleslaw</li>
<li>Crispy Onion Bits (they come in a tub, your local supermarket should have them)</li>
<li>Ground Black Pepper</li>
<li>Ham (Brady's glazed is what I used)</li>
<li>Sliced Spanish Chorizo</li>
<li>Italian Salami</li>
<li>Cheese & Onion Crisps (I used King on this occasion)</li>
</ul>
Start off by splitting the roll in half. If you're the proud owner of an electric toaster give both halves a blast in it for about 45 seconds, not for the purpose of toasting, just enough to warm them through. This really gives a soft roll an extra bit of magic in the mouth department.<br />
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The order of assembly is quite important and without going into sandwich nerd mode this is what I think works best.<br />
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Start off by spreading mayonnaise on both halves, If you don't like mayonnaise you'd probably be best off reading a different blog. On the bottom half put a little squirt of the mustard and spread it out evenly, the mayo will dilute its strength which would otherwise be a little too distressing for the sensitive hungover palate.<br />
On top of this put three slices of salami, two slices of chorizo (halved) and three slices of tomato.<br />
On the top half of the roll put about 6 slices of cheese of a thickness of your preference, I aim for a cut of about 1.5 to 2mm, then 2 slices of the Irish ham.<br />
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Next up absolutely destroy the tomatoes with pepper. I don't put any salt on them because I'm very health concious but I'm sure a little would be no harm if that's your pleasure. Put a generous amount of rocket on top of the tomatoes.<br />
Cut the scallion into thin slices and put them on top of the ham side along with a liberal sprinkling of the crispy onions, don't be afraid that you're putting on too many as they'll need good numbers to break through the next ingredient: <i>The Coleslaw</i>. Coleslaw is a dangerous substance in a sandwich, it's delicious but it completely overpowers everything around it and since this sandwich has no defining central ingredient that you want to stand out you have to be careful with it. The amount above is the absolute most you should put on, I was on my 4th pint and God only knows how many free shot glasses of wine at the time so I was maybe a little too generous.<br />
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Which brings me nicely along to the next and final step in creating this monstrosity. <i>Crisps</i>. I've spoken at length before about <a href="http://www.theboozeyswine.com/2011/05/classic-crisp-sandwich-and-tasty-crisp.html" target="_blank">crisp sandwiches</a> but allow me to reiterate a few points:<br />
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<ul>
<li>Go with Cheese & Onion, other flavours just aren't as good in a sandwich, simple as that. </li>
<li>The brand choice is paramount, Walkers had always been my favourite for this purpose but they've changed the recipe lately and now I'm not so sure so I went for the old reliable King crisp. Don't be tempted to go with fancy artisan brands, they're grand when you're eating them from the bag but their stronger flavour, harder texture and thickness do not suit a sandwich in my opinion. </li>
<li>Coleslaw and crisps together is the greatest thing since (I am <i>not</i> going to say it), seriously, put some in your next crisp sandwich. Also in a sandwich like this the coleslaw acts as a glue holding the crisps in place, which is convenient.</li>
<li>Quantity. Don't go overboard, break up a handful of crisps, the amount above is a good guideline.</li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnhloiQKv5MXRvJXcMELD3ja4MpVvgIRAvxinUVcf4uLh9sUCA0YLA1xDFvk292qAXzuEVCZ0Pv4NwFS819Wi7sMO1tA1D676qsoekaiSE2Pd6sdwces0XGLI7HQyRyhHdj4a0mgyU_74/s1600/5.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnhloiQKv5MXRvJXcMELD3ja4MpVvgIRAvxinUVcf4uLh9sUCA0YLA1xDFvk292qAXzuEVCZ0Pv4NwFS819Wi7sMO1tA1D676qsoekaiSE2Pd6sdwces0XGLI7HQyRyhHdj4a0mgyU_74/s400/5.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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That's it, close it up and you're done. Just approach the nearest physically intimidating celebrity, hand it to him and stand nervously to one side while he silently chews his first bite all the while giving away no clue as to whether he's going to take a second bite or spit it out...<br />
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He took a second bite. <i>Thanks be to Jaysus.</i> He opened his mouth to speak and out came one, short, music to my ears declaration:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHzDIkcwgogH2iZVRht1r97tT-FAcokjX39L1cHwUBqfwEtVJ2j7G66fxPLjzC_ZjoFg9Hn7Ro-_QdgO9JyqmND53uvnj6D5X5rjZrZpqYNNLg6JxKVUfUNQp371ByFUqFsZ3Fc4HAuDs/s1600/damo.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiHzDIkcwgogH2iZVRht1r97tT-FAcokjX39L1cHwUBqfwEtVJ2j7G66fxPLjzC_ZjoFg9Hn7Ro-_QdgO9JyqmND53uvnj6D5X5rjZrZpqYNNLg6JxKVUfUNQp371ByFUqFsZ3Fc4HAuDs/s400/damo.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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<span style="text-align: start;"><b><i><span style="font-size: large;">"It's a beauty"</span></i></b></span></div>
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...and with that I could consider the day a success. I'd like to say a huge thank you to KC, Ann, Adelle and Lenny for the opportunity to surely be the first person to walk through the gates of Taste of Dublin (or any other food festival for that matter) with a 6 pack of King crisps under their arm, Damien Dempsey who was, as always, a pleasure and an absolute gentleman and to Stephen Connelly and Tim Crowley for taking these photos and bringing me pints respectively. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglCu_W3KNub4xkPvyoWhIsdjOZp6sDgmK3xl-fT21SF8rYOUkO22r6vXRlFZKyHqVKOnGX8q0ybppcSelJhOCl6zqsfXOEB2OBRxT0twdUsa_4I7HOw2PFoJDxnOs3HFxRggHoc1AOBrU/s1600/Jean.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglCu_W3KNub4xkPvyoWhIsdjOZp6sDgmK3xl-fT21SF8rYOUkO22r6vXRlFZKyHqVKOnGX8q0ybppcSelJhOCl6zqsfXOEB2OBRxT0twdUsa_4I7HOw2PFoJDxnOs3HFxRggHoc1AOBrU/s320/Jean.jpg" width="299" /></a></div>
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I'd also like to give a big shout out to Jean-Christophe Novelli who I met after the show and wanted to have a picture taken with me, he's a big fan of my work and someday dreams of making it as a chef. Never give up Jean-Christophe. Never give up.</div>
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Here's a bit of Mr. Dempsey to sooth the soul. Thanks for reading, and don't be afraid to give the page an aul like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
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B.S </div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-6368488825572522942013-05-29T00:07:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:14:07.515+01:00Rasher Sandwich Bagel ( A 1am Kitchen Raid Victory)I had a bit of a route around the kitchen last night to see if there was the makings of a sandwich and hit the blessed trinity of ingredients.<br />
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<ul>
<li>Good bread.</li>
<li>Good cheese.</li>
<li>Rashers.</li>
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In this case sesame seed bagels, decent white cheddar cheese (Kilmeaden purple block) and a full packet of rashers. This is very similar to a <a href="http://www.theboozeyswine.com/2011/12/simple-auld-rasher-sandwich.html" target="_blank">rasher sandwich</a> I put up here before but I will repeat myself without guilt if only to hammer home the point that when someone asks you do you want red sauce or brown sauce on your rasher sandwich your reply should always be "I'll have cheese and mayonnaise please".<br />
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A halved and lightly toasted bagel generously spread with mayonnaise on both sides filled with 3 rashers and plenty of good cheese is a pleasure in life that I guarantee you will repeat until you shuffle off your mortal coil (which could be sooner rather than later if you keep eating these). If there's a bit of cream cheese knocking around fire that in too, any kind of rocket or spinach leaves in the gaf? By all means go for it... This is all I had so this is how I rolled (or in this case bageled).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitFXTCyzpGg-xDE6TsgcHd-BLGidI0AbsRk-20Yn_VMj2TJEKVKzXcOauwySK-8lywGZXuW25KI4dXLHRAHd6S9vmt0dwSZWJG0b-9UJYmWzLNGdkBIJ9QgCH7MiAXKg_wzD41UPiTrp0/s1600/aaa.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitFXTCyzpGg-xDE6TsgcHd-BLGidI0AbsRk-20Yn_VMj2TJEKVKzXcOauwySK-8lywGZXuW25KI4dXLHRAHd6S9vmt0dwSZWJG0b-9UJYmWzLNGdkBIJ9QgCH7MiAXKg_wzD41UPiTrp0/s400/aaa.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Throw a bit of coleslaw and a packet of cheese & onion crisps on the side to really set that shit off and you've got a meal fit for any man, woman or unhealthy child. I seriously don't know how they're not packaging coleslaw and cheese & onion crisps together in some form or other yet, they were born for each other, they're like some non alcoholic yet just as damaging food version of Red Bull and Vodka.</div>
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B.S</div>
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a></div>
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-5097407061134357952013-05-28T19:32:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:14:53.644+01:00Preview: Brunch With Boozey. Happy Valley Festival Sunday 2nd June.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDOkjycuYVk_CmUyEEuHS1avzDwJ08ZiKfCbcwF9qkMNsxhMh1ZlBxNO1yr1-IOR0_-lTW7iYBqeMKXseqagt5ENzFOSVyQNAwUnymHaXLmKYxcIohVJls3SNNS2rJ0WzbV3GvNnJEVJ0/s1600/hhhhh.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgDOkjycuYVk_CmUyEEuHS1avzDwJ08ZiKfCbcwF9qkMNsxhMh1ZlBxNO1yr1-IOR0_-lTW7iYBqeMKXseqagt5ENzFOSVyQNAwUnymHaXLmKYxcIohVJls3SNNS2rJ0WzbV3GvNnJEVJ0/s1600/hhhhh.jpg" width="283" /></a></div>
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This weekend 'Feeding time with...' will be making it's first festival appearance in the form of </div>
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'Brunch with Boozey' at the 'Happy Valley Festival' in Thomastown in Co. Kilkenny.</div>
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To say that Thomastown is close to my heart would be a major understatement. In the close to 10 years that I've been visiting this beautiful wild town on the banks of the River Nore I've had a lot of the best times of my life and made countless life long friends in the process. </div>
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The pinnacle of the great festivals on offer here every year is the 'Happy Valley Festival', like everything in Thomastown there's really only a rough guideline as to when it starts and ends but every June Bank Holiday weekend for years I've been making a pilgrimage to partake in and attempt to survive its madness.</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;">This year will be no different except I've been kindly asked to kick off proceedings at the infamous 15 for €15 show in Murphy's that takes place all day Sunday with 'Brunch with Boozey' which will entail amongst other things food for everyone who arrives early AND a Sandwich Competition which is open to anyone attending and all musicians playing during the day. All you have to do is bring a Sandwich to the gig and myself and my panel of esteemed judges will decide how it rates alongside all the others. There will be 2 (drink related) prizes, one for best tasting sandwich and one for the maddest sandwich. Of course I'll insist on having a shot of the winners prize with them, it's only fair.</span></div>
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Also at some point in the day (sobriety permitting) I'll have a rummage through the pub kitchen, and failing that anywhere else in the town, and construct a Happy Valley inspired sandwich for anyone who fancies a bit of an afternoon snack. </div>
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To keep up with the latest info on this event like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a> for a full run down on everything at Happy Valley visit <a href="http://www.happyvalleyfestival.com/wordpress/" target="_blank">www.happyvalleyfestival.com</a></div>
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Looking forward to seeing you there and sharing in a bit of the joyous madness.</div>
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B. Swine.</div>
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-78385227997772203762013-05-28T18:29:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:21:34.896+01:00Van Sandwiches: Knoxville Morning Tour Apr '13<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisPn8zjkWbGMR8c4NtWcQLuyz5UzDEaudpL4_gy6l6c-GdmE-XdIzid8oFjaYl3zV4NASy-IWrX5K_TfkywXXS_7Rw_gDmdpVmhKHRLoDjxx7KHy8iVo-652lb-uDXJ1J5Sm3QL0bu4yM/s1600/van+part+1.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisPn8zjkWbGMR8c4NtWcQLuyz5UzDEaudpL4_gy6l6c-GdmE-XdIzid8oFjaYl3zV4NASy-IWrX5K_TfkywXXS_7Rw_gDmdpVmhKHRLoDjxx7KHy8iVo-652lb-uDXJ1J5Sm3QL0bu4yM/s400/van+part+1.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Ah life on the open road... The joy and excitement of not having to play by societies rules... Will it be one hour or four hours before we happen upon another roadside service station and the inevitable ham & cheese sandwich from the fridge?... That absolute certainty that you'll be eating those poxy paprika crisps along with it... Will the admission charge to the next soulless service station toilets be 70c or will I hit the jackpot and only be charged 50c?... What insane amount of money will the French extort from us to pass through the next toll bridge?... Will the smell of farts ever leave the van?... Will I ever get sick of Mezzo Mix?... What a great way to live.</div>
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Here's a sample of the culinary joys I was subjected to on a daily basis and grew to love and loathe in varying measures while living out of a van with my friends as we travelled around some of Europe.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIY1qD3uMmkp6NuebDyDe7kLBhqAi0ebsSi19ryk9fDQyKL_TfoGoYon7AjwOdaFEJL3J8UmT16737DerZ3NqHlxqi5jPpFt_9e0Rrky0wmiJczbZ5HTV91Cy7DjE-1T7t0vWdMxvQWSs/s1600/lucozade.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIY1qD3uMmkp6NuebDyDe7kLBhqAi0ebsSi19ryk9fDQyKL_TfoGoYon7AjwOdaFEJL3J8UmT16737DerZ3NqHlxqi5jPpFt_9e0Rrky0wmiJczbZ5HTV91Cy7DjE-1T7t0vWdMxvQWSs/s400/lucozade.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Ireland. Lunch time and we pointed the van out of Newbridge in the direction of Rosslare Harbour. Not wanting to ruin my dinner in a couple of hours I'd make do with a packet of Ripples and what would be my last bottle of Lucozade for nearly 2 and a half weeks. I followed this up with a pint of Guinness in Enniscorthy while watching a bit of football and a bag of cans at the last off-license before the harbour, all of which turned out to be bad ideas considering we didn't so much sail to France as jostle with the sea like two pissed 18 year old lads would outside a niteclub on a Saturday night, both as equally afraid to throw the first punch as they are to lose face in front of their girlfriends. Not a pleasant 18 hour crossing.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDuA9sKeNrYX0VrqBpRgHMQ1zlb4dRkzKMfiqNmVEOFW6bGI8r-w1VM6Ao9XFxX7xCi5EPFAlfxkNHWLEES1sCQXRBZjDPInn1R83NjF3jr8Z48BDLN0FozEPtT028yLmcPsZfbeXeULs/s1600/france.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjDuA9sKeNrYX0VrqBpRgHMQ1zlb4dRkzKMfiqNmVEOFW6bGI8r-w1VM6Ao9XFxX7xCi5EPFAlfxkNHWLEES1sCQXRBZjDPInn1R83NjF3jr8Z48BDLN0FozEPtT028yLmcPsZfbeXeULs/s400/france.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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We hit the ground running wanting to make our first destination of Amsterdam in good time, of course this didn't happen, primarily due to the nation of Belgium just being one long drawn out traffic jam. We did manage to pull into some brand of a service station in France before this where I purchased the above combination of bread and potatoes whilst exhausting my full arsenal of the French language over the duration of the transaction. Not expecting a whole lot from either I got roughly what I expected. Bolognese crisps aren't going to be drawing you away from Cheese & Onion should they try to fob them off on us any time soon. The sandwich was never going to win any awards, it was my boundless optimism that the French are enjoying a better standard of garage snack to us that set me up for this minor disappointment. </div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYKJfsLwK6Wwtd0gkI-ABYdq_zpLb-XVZn83seAUAV6z5YU-3iJsdQCPVg5rEGAiXy5sJKFpgsom47kC1IdKSo-7w4X9rEtoGPKxfs2NHEdehfExUHaJRU1kGnuHZA3KglmTZuQhFtQmI/s1600/mezzo.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjYKJfsLwK6Wwtd0gkI-ABYdq_zpLb-XVZn83seAUAV6z5YU-3iJsdQCPVg5rEGAiXy5sJKFpgsom47kC1IdKSo-7w4X9rEtoGPKxfs2NHEdehfExUHaJRU1kGnuHZA3KglmTZuQhFtQmI/s400/mezzo.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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A special mention needs to go out to the this gear, Mezzo Mix. Lucozade being my morning kick starter of choice for many years I often struggle when abroad to find a suitable alternative. I'd gotten numerous messages to try this orange flavoured cola, which is in abundant supply throughout Germany, and while expecting to be sickened by it I was more than drawn in to its subtle and endearingly flavoursome beauty. It got me out of many a minor hangover over the following weeks.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEh8VKaJlCFOOJYFSWUVSb6euUUMXP7o3WjJZnR_FqME44ESyga-4H48GmXCQXGfmQpskOBLS3BTtzA2Yk2maNRjMb3xcYRFw9mwNKHa7DlxG4EUQlrL1VPmmzARPlM5pa3j4FHd_N_h0/s1600/germany.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhEh8VKaJlCFOOJYFSWUVSb6euUUMXP7o3WjJZnR_FqME44ESyga-4H48GmXCQXGfmQpskOBLS3BTtzA2Yk2maNRjMb3xcYRFw9mwNKHa7DlxG4EUQlrL1VPmmzARPlM5pa3j4FHd_N_h0/s400/germany.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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I can honestly say that my only culinary disappointment with the entirety of my time in Germany, and I'm sure my compadres would agree with me on this, is that there is severe hardship involved in locating a crisp that is not Paprika flavoured. This isn't a problem for the first or maybe second packet but by Jaysus they soon wear very thin on the taste buds. This sandwich was quite similar to it's French counterpart apart form the inclusion of Salami in place of the Jambon (that being 'Ham' and not the delicacy that it refers to in Ireland). The salad dressing was nice and spicy thanks to some red peppers and jalapeños but I did it no favours by letting it sit in a scorching hot van for a half an hour before consumption. </div>
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There's not a lot to say about this. Just a pastry with some bog standard tomato bolognese sauce in it and the obligatory large bag of Paprika's. Germany proceeded to hit me with the above scenarios (and some very similar variants) for the duration of our stay... Then we crossed back over the border into France...</div>
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About 5 minutes over the German/France border we stopped into the first garage we saw. Equal parts delighted with the varieties of crisps on display and pissed off with the only sandwich available to me I set about making the most of the situation...</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi94CukJD1hsj5QM3RFukNRUoK8M0xq1R3CfI4KHdhYwfoEbs9iyI-tay1od4H1yifXbgAbeoCyki_efLvAG1Lz0r0ihRHy7fUY8QZ-llabXOQpDYf2M8yTLt0omsn_fHYqrX1BMtTFbS8/s1600/cheeseburger.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi94CukJD1hsj5QM3RFukNRUoK8M0xq1R3CfI4KHdhYwfoEbs9iyI-tay1od4H1yifXbgAbeoCyki_efLvAG1Lz0r0ihRHy7fUY8QZ-llabXOQpDYf2M8yTLt0omsn_fHYqrX1BMtTFbS8/s400/cheeseburger.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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<i>By constructing this monstrosity. </i></div>
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At some point along the trip a bottle of hot sauce found its way into the belly of our 4 wheeled beast and I thought this would be the catalyst to make this utterly boring French cheese roll topped with Cheeseburger crisps (they tasted exactly like a Micky D's cheeseburger, decide for yourself if this is a good or bad thing) into something a little more exciting. I was wrong, it was a hardship that set me up not very nicely for the 6 hour drive to Paris. Bad Buzz.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_xB8Nn1QVvkHQ0ZsNduwGPsOAVBgNN4dp2GXccg-V2UG-K2xct8qddo9-W0JNmQDKg9xamG1Kct61ywwHvEytx2YedubEBooa-DYHsMLWlJAuTgVMltQwc3I2jJi91fTElE4RWwuhZX8/s1600/munch.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_xB8Nn1QVvkHQ0ZsNduwGPsOAVBgNN4dp2GXccg-V2UG-K2xct8qddo9-W0JNmQDKg9xamG1Kct61ywwHvEytx2YedubEBooa-DYHsMLWlJAuTgVMltQwc3I2jJi91fTElE4RWwuhZX8/s400/munch.JPG" width="400" /></a></div>
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Why break the habit? Last day and 15 minutes from Cherbourg and the ferry home we made our final stop off. While the lads set about buying enough bottles of wine to capsize the ferry I made a lonely venture around the massive supermarket hoping against all hope that I might see a sandwich that was more appealing than the previous weeks Ham & Cheese, clearly I didn't. I decided the only thing to make it interesting would be to consume it with Ham & Cheese flavour crisps, or in this case the nearest I could find to crisps being some kind of own brand snacks they called 'Monster Munch' that bore little physical or tastual resemblance to any Monster Munch I've eaten before. All in all I had hoped for more from the garages of Europe, but that's just the way it goes... Thankfully the food we had outside the van was worlds apart from this hardship, I'll tell you all about that very soon in <i>Part 2...</i><br />
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B.S<br />
<br />
Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-74273597766858581802013-04-12T21:12:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:22:29.965+01:00Manchester, March '13Right.<br />
Manchester.<br />
First things fucking first.<br />
What in the name of all that is holy is this fucking thing?<br />
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<i>Everybody has a line they won't cross... This is my line.</i></div>
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I go over for a nice quite weekend. You know... meet up with a couple of friends, go to a United match, few harmless pints afterwards... "ah sure we'll stop in here (random kebab shop) for something to eat before we head home"... That was my first mistake. The next was ordering a "mixed" kebab.<br />
I don't know what this thing was or who it belonged to or was attached to in a previous life but it wasn't about to join the long list of nasty shit I've eaten over the years I can tell you that.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTQJ3mjNf4KLLPIiZF9El28sBRd7aX53xQMknh5M0GUstWRkqdh6dTVzYrek0o55uPUQre_i4U8-9YLFt2epEnmKeG5iV0lnbKlEje56TM_tplzKmxBZ2DZs7sDgVbK7xnKAIzjd4xKQY/s1600/IMG_6742.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTQJ3mjNf4KLLPIiZF9El28sBRd7aX53xQMknh5M0GUstWRkqdh6dTVzYrek0o55uPUQre_i4U8-9YLFt2epEnmKeG5iV0lnbKlEje56TM_tplzKmxBZ2DZs7sDgVbK7xnKAIzjd4xKQY/s320/IMG_6742.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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I was well chuffed with the spread of gear we were presented with when I opened the take away boxes, it looked super, just the way to end a grand weekend. By Jaysus I abandoned all notions of finishing my kebab after I pulled that creature from its depths.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLpnaIlIOfshsvinQVSRo6mqYK7iDgN9kpeOB085dHw7NDshEZQANNfNA-6nbTD36qnJ6ET2pBRv0K1FTBKIlRs0FP1ia9JdBWSruCJ3OAaMPGfONFPJwXKWMwcEOpIy0OvyZVKSsvFQw/s1600/IMG_6747.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiLpnaIlIOfshsvinQVSRo6mqYK7iDgN9kpeOB085dHw7NDshEZQANNfNA-6nbTD36qnJ6ET2pBRv0K1FTBKIlRs0FP1ia9JdBWSruCJ3OAaMPGfONFPJwXKWMwcEOpIy0OvyZVKSsvFQw/s320/IMG_6747.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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It creeped me out to the point that I'd to leave the room and eat my gravy chips on the balcony and even then I wasn't right.<br />
The gravy chips were very very lovely though.<br />
(<i>photos up to here by my compadre and photographer of some note</i> <a href="http://linearcutter.tumblr.com/">Steve Neville</a>)<br />
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Anyway I'll reverse the lorry a bit...<br />
<i>Day 1</i>. In my usual fashion of ignoring all the detailed well considered advice of friends on where to eat in a place I'm travelling to I set off for Manchester with a belly full of breakfast roll and Lucozade and proceeded to eat nothing but slices of pizza for the remainder of my first day. Take that curry mile.<br />
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<i>Day 2</i> started not so good. After spending the previous evening drinking bottle after bottle of beer and slice after slice of pizza with a soundtrack of Thin Lizzy and The Stone Roses with my friends Steve and Lorraine in their magnificently appointed apartment overlooking Old Trafford, followed by numerous more ill advised pints in the residents bar of my hotel the old stomach wasn't in the best of form. I avoided the over priced room service breakfast and decided a cure all Lucozade would do the trick. I wandered up to Old Trafford soon after and decided a bit of food might not go astray after all.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxe9e9EgBZubk3sxBy8wSXvhyO3Wm24eX2xgTAzWXM2hs6gtdyeRe-s-bMDzNRLXbf9MAXZ6lCKK4mee8-n1Ecjm-FBKxi523B2HeLpFd3vaI6Bor1q7JHCrMyneWaELc58zaOEEEV3CM/s1600/IMG_4195.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxe9e9EgBZubk3sxBy8wSXvhyO3Wm24eX2xgTAzWXM2hs6gtdyeRe-s-bMDzNRLXbf9MAXZ6lCKK4mee8-n1Ecjm-FBKxi523B2HeLpFd3vaI6Bor1q7JHCrMyneWaELc58zaOEEEV3CM/s320/IMG_4195.jpg" width="238" /></a></div>
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<i>food travel shows... I am available for work...</i></div>
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A simple standard fare hot dog was about all that was on offer to a fella like me in the cheap seats... I think you'll forgive me if I don't dwell too long on the hot dog, it was what it was.<br />
What is worth mentioning though is shortly after this photo was taken and the dog eaten I wandered down to the edge of the pitch and stood face right up against the safety netting just to the left of the practice goal seen in the picture as Manchester United's well paid ball booters practised taking shots. Me being the gobshite I am decided to pay more attention to sub keeper Anders Lindegaard's imminent dive rather than the flight of the ball that had just left the foot of Robin van Persie. A ball that didn't hit its presumed intended target but instead connected quite sweetly with, to the surprise of both Mr. van Persie and myself; not to mention to the considerable amusement of everyone around me, the middle of my forehead.<br />
Safe in the knowledge that I'd gotten my daily dose of public humiliation out of the way I happily watched United beat Norwich 4-0 and continued on with my day.<br />
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Later on that evening Steve, Lorraine and myself decided to head into Deansgate for a bit of grub and ended up in a pub called The Knott Bar. A nice place with a full jukebox, wet pints and, considering they were 3 minutes away from finishing their food service for the evening, good burgers.<br />
Lorraine went for the vegetarian option of the haloumi and falafel burger which she was kind enough to let me taste.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDAyIQ9iCBUoZ8ujxFNquxh_ObnACf-iLAoNOt9pN5BhKluufPkPdVKfc7wGLMqxMjKpLDuwh2I7ydLGrQ05Zk5PqSd35eno5RfnQi_kY2GowVeUpydfFQSufeWOHvF82Ljwhqp-32lVA/s1600/IMG_4217.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="238" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDAyIQ9iCBUoZ8ujxFNquxh_ObnACf-iLAoNOt9pN5BhKluufPkPdVKfc7wGLMqxMjKpLDuwh2I7ydLGrQ05Zk5PqSd35eno5RfnQi_kY2GowVeUpydfFQSufeWOHvF82Ljwhqp-32lVA/s320/IMG_4217.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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It was really nice; a lot of times the vegetarian options in restaurants can be quite boring and limited but this was something I, as a carnivore, would have been quite happy with.<br />
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Myself and Steve had a choice between a beef burger or a lamb burger with goats cheese; we decided to fuck shit up and order one of each and create a half beef/half lamb hybrid.<br />
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Again they were really good; my only complaint and this is not being levelled solely at this establishment; it's at a growing number of restaurants who think that it's suitable to replace a burger bun with ciabatta bread. It's not. It's too much. A buns primary job as far as I'm concerned is to hold its contents together on their voyage from plate to face. With ciabatta you've to do too much work to get to the good stuff; it's like a child proof cap on a burger. It's too tough, too filling and acts like a sponge leaving the overall burger eating experience a lot drier. Apart from that the food was delicious.<br />
This leads me up to the aforementioned point in the night where we went for a few drinks and ended up in that less than ideal kebab situation but sure you know how that panned out.<br />
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<i>Day 3</i> and wanting to banish the previous nights demons from my system I met up with Steve and we headed into town to get our breakfast on. We arrived at a nice looking spot called <a href="http://www.thekoffeepot.co.uk/">The Koffee Pot</a>. As tempting as the prospect of Haggis for breakfast was I went for an old reliable fry up (no picture required) while Steve ordered Kippers. You're on your own there fella.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZy4cULn5p3kiS99aQy3MSDIRgOXIMHbqynS17TW6zmfpfNKV-TRswTVjwuADstk5Hz-gefy3DWjuPaVRX_s4op-nNTa7uiwir-EKWwVlNBTRaQ3c5G9UNX-ypZyLkeEQF8ID8fd-HcMQ/s1600/IMG_4249.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZy4cULn5p3kiS99aQy3MSDIRgOXIMHbqynS17TW6zmfpfNKV-TRswTVjwuADstk5Hz-gefy3DWjuPaVRX_s4op-nNTa7uiwir-EKWwVlNBTRaQ3c5G9UNX-ypZyLkeEQF8ID8fd-HcMQ/s320/IMG_4249.jpg" width="238" /></a></div>
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What arrived down to him was one of the more unusual plates of breakfast I've seen, a wedge of toast you could build a house on topped with kippers, a poached egg and wholegrain mustard butter. I sampled a bit of course... and while not horrified I happily returned to my full English breakfast.<br />
Weekend over I set about making my way back to Ireland stopping only for some kind of a vanilla cream custard filled chocolate coated donut from Krispy Kreme which was pretty fucking spectacular.<br />
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Until next time Manchester, I'll try my best to be a little more adventurous but it's not really my style.<br />
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B.S<br />
<br />
Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
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<i>G'wan the lads</i></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-51549521640293369112013-04-09T15:08:00.000+01:002017-04-11T12:22:37.519+01:00Tayto Bar - Milk Chocolate Bar with Cheese & Onion Crisps<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Back in January news broke that Tayto were selling their own brand of chocolate at their Tayto Park in Ashbourne Co. Meath. The only question on anyone's lips upon hearing this was "What, is there crisps <i>IN</i> the chocolate?"</div>
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There wasn't. But look what the cute hoors have gone and done now...<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifgzGDnwsGeOqKJ7uZ-WVh_LW-Lj18Lx0bUkxTGUdYrIAQ37Wfrp98QXFznDnhJ0vGb9OUNmiD9PsQ1lz7MWQ-aBoJKD6ztAiNHFJ8gDBdC7KTkAmpZqc920Rsc-3pCdcJhlCM71hoeXA/s1600/IMG_4627.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifgzGDnwsGeOqKJ7uZ-WVh_LW-Lj18Lx0bUkxTGUdYrIAQ37Wfrp98QXFznDnhJ0vGb9OUNmiD9PsQ1lz7MWQ-aBoJKD6ztAiNHFJ8gDBdC7KTkAmpZqc920Rsc-3pCdcJhlCM71hoeXA/s320/IMG_4627.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
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I put this picture up on the <a href="https://www.facebook.com/ftwtheboozeyswine"><span id="goog_1973320996"></span>Feeding time... Facebook page<span id="goog_1973320997"></span></a> yesterday evening and the frenzied reaction to it was pretty much split down the middle between people dying to try it and people absolutely disgusted by this unholy union.<br />
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But obviously first and foremost what everyone want's to know is what's it like and is it nice.<br />
<br />
Well it's not revolting as I was expecting. I thought I'd be spitting it out and passing the rest on to some unsuspecting mug.<br />
I'll try to make this as concise as possible.<br />
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<ul>
<li>The chocolate isn't the best, but I wasn't expecting much on that front.</li>
<li>The crisp pieces are a small step up from dust but still plentiful enough (7% apparently) so that you can hear a little crunch in your mouth. </li>
<li>The overall experience is like eating a bar of chocolate with crispy pieces in it, kinda like a Golden Crisp or similar but with much much smaller bits, while the after-taste of a chocolate and crisp binge is being dispersed into your mouth as if by magic.</li>
</ul>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyn8PXejKFfzq5A9g4krc9iLHqvkh4yIMVskCfWNntctQ-jJ_vbG7302-Kkbssz1KMG8cbbwGRLZDhmPBtNJMahEQhHthUT1TbkYoPOi8Ix5mfmDQtFZ_hTImtMX259z_4Jmoh1M-yBBI/s1600/IMG_4640+-+Copy.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="286" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgyn8PXejKFfzq5A9g4krc9iLHqvkh4yIMVskCfWNntctQ-jJ_vbG7302-Kkbssz1KMG8cbbwGRLZDhmPBtNJMahEQhHthUT1TbkYoPOi8Ix5mfmDQtFZ_hTImtMX259z_4Jmoh1M-yBBI/s320/IMG_4640+-+Copy.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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<i>Third line down in the ingredients, Tayto Cheese and Onion!</i></div>
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But this is where it misses the point. That after-taste is a gentle (shameful to some, not me) reminder of what you've just eaten, in this case a bag of Tayto and a bar of chocolate, except you haven't. Crisps and chocolate are delicious together, whether you're a crisps before chocolate person (like me), chocolate before crisps or you eat both at the same time. It's an experience that can't be replaced. Not that this is what Tayto are trying to do here; I've just never wanted the taste of chocolate and crisps in my mouth without actually eating them, anyone who has gotten a shift off someone who's just after eating this combination can attest to this. </div>
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<br />
The bar is a novelty and nothing more in my opinion and it seems that Tayto don't seem to be marketing it as anything but that; They're playing up the 'Limited Edition' tag and it would be wise for them not to expect much repeat business.<br />
<br />
Give it a try but you'll back to the old reliable bag and a bar in no time.<br />
<br />
Hopefully this be the last of Tayto's chocolate experiments although if I spot a Turkish Delight infused with Prawn Cocktail crisps they will be getting another 99c out of me.<br />
<br />
B.S<br />
<br />
Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-73021176299578371062013-03-22T19:44:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:22:46.904+01:00Tea and Brown Sauce. Don't Bother.<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<br />
Ever see that film Intermission?<br />
Colm Meaney's in it.<br />
<br />
There's a famous scene in it where three lads played by Cillian Murphy, Colin Farrell and Brían O'Byrne are sitting in a café having breakfast when Cillian Murphy's character requests some brown sauce, when the waitress duly obliges he proceeds to pour a generous amount of the sauce into his cup of tea where he's met with the eloquent response of "ya scummy fucker" from Colin Farrell's character.<br />
O'Byrne's character then requests "a shot" of the sauce, says its delicious and so our Colin not wanting to miss out tries it in his own tea then drops the classic and much quoted line...<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="text-align: start;"><i> "That's fuckin' delish man"</i></span></div>
<br />
I, like every other soul upon witnessing this scene, had one basic thought manifest in my head...<br />
"Nah, that couldn't be nice... Could it?"<br />
<br />
I'm not a tea drinker. I have drank cups of tea, I just don't drink them on a regular basis. I don't understand people who get in from a hard day at the office and all they want is a cup of tea. Tea, in this sense being a standard cup with milk and no sugar, is something I find boring as shite.<br />
<br />
I like sugar, I find a spoon of sugar improves the taste of tea.<br />
I like honey, I also think it makes tea more palatable.<br />
I have a similar feelings when it comes to the inclusion of whiskey or brandy to tea.<br />
<br />
<b><i>I also love Brown Sauce.</i></b><br />
<br />
Which brings me to 3.30am this morning. Bored, wide awake and experiencing more than a little cabin fever 'that' scene from Intermission came into my brain. I should have told my brain to fuck off ya scummy fucker but in my mind I had nothing to lose.<br />
<br />
In retrospect, I won't say my first mistake as there were many up to this point, my <i>next </i>mistake was putting milk into the tea.<br />
The moment I poured the 'shot' of brown sauce, similar in proportion to that of the film, into the tea the milk had a reaction which I will only describe as horrific.<br />
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="text-align: start;">Serious curdling going on.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="text-align: start;"><br /></span></div>
I should have aborted the mission right then and there and no one would have been any the wiser.<br />
But no no, I decided to plough on.<br />
<br />
I reassured myself with the knowledge that I would only have to take a sip, what harm could that do? The purpose of this exercise was not to see how I felt after drinking a full cup but solely to find out how it tasted.<br />
<br />
I raised the cup to my mouth, placed my lips on the edge ( it's getting all Fifty Shades Of Tae in here... I'll get my coat) and took a sip...<br />
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<br />
It wasn't that bad. Not at all what I was expecting, kinda fruity, "I think I can manage another sip" I thought.<br />
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<br />
This second sip is where everything went to shit.<br />
It was not fuckin' delish man.<br />
I'll spare you the grotesqueness but I will say I have a new found familiarity with my kitchen sink and the dog, who had being sleeping at the time, isn't being friendly to me today.<br />
<br />
A decent scientist would focus on the milk and the fact that it curdled, that I should re do the experiment with a cup of tea without milk. Yeah. I probably won't be doing that.<br />
<br />
I'll leave it up to yourselves whether or not you want to give this 'a shot'...<br />
<br />
B.S<br />
<br />
Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-25499637674715139882013-03-22T01:16:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:23:17.739+01:00Pat The Baker 'Slimbos'<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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These cropped up on my radar about a month or so ago but my initial delight at how good they looked was scuppered by the 'Slimbo' label combined with a presumably low calorie content. Admittedly I had no idea how many calories a slice of bread should have but they only tend to draw your attention towards these things when there's very little of them. Turns out 100 is roughly the calorie content of a sneeze.<br />
I hesitated to purchase them on these grounds on a number of occasions before finally making a move on them last week.<br />
<br />
Right let's get down to brass tacks:<br />
<ul>
<li>Pat markets these as 'tasty white bread squares'. He ain't lying. Tasty they are.</li>
<li>Topped with sesame and linseed? Yup. Give 'em to me. Delicious. There's also a couple of other varieties which I'm sure are just fine too.</li>
<li>Each square is about equivalent to one single small slice of bread.</li>
<li>Each square splits into two so the sandwich will basically contain half as much bread as normal, and thus half as much of those tasty bread carbs that help maintain my sanity.</li>
<li>If you are on a diet and have a modicum of self control this is a good thing. </li>
<li>I am neither on a diet nor a possessor of a detectable amount of self control.</li>
<li>These are most definitely not marketed at the likes of me.</li>
</ul>
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<br /></div>
Upon initial inspection these things didn't look like they'd withstand the construction process of a normal sandwich, I felt a little reinforcing could be needed.<br />
<br />
Rashers, rocket and cheese were on my agenda that evening and with the necessary strengthening of the bread in mind I decided to up the cheese stakes by doing a combination of, which is absolutely phenomenal, cream cheese topped with grated cheddar instead of any butter or mayonnaise. Prior to this I gave the 'Slimbos' about 30 seconds in the toaster just to give them an extra bit of back bone before spreading the comparatively stronger (to mayo/butter) cream cheese on top.<br />
<br />
I have a rule which I like to pretend is real. That rule is the six rasher rule. Any more than that would be downright piggery. The truth is I haven't figured out a way to fit more than six rashers onto my grill and anyway there's usually 6 in the packs that I buy so I can stay on that high horse until one or both of those factors change.<br />
<br />
I decided the six rashers split over three Slimbos would be the sensible way to go.<br />
<br />
I threw the rashers under the grill, split the Slimbos in half and toasted them for 30 seconds each, spread each side with the cream cheese and sprinkled both generously with cheddar cheese.<br />
<br />
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<br />
Apologies for the shitty photo but what I did next was I heated up the oven and waited until the rashers were nearly done, at this stage I put the Slimbos into the oven so the cream and cheddar cheeses would melt together. This is where the magical cheese alchemy starts to happen, cream cheese and cheddar cheese are just fine but if you don't melt them together you're not gonna have super cheese, and believe me you want super cheese. I find it helps to look into the oven window singing that Spice Girls jam '2 Become 1' just for a little bit of moral encouragement. A couple of minutes should do the trick, you don't want the cheese turning brown, just a nice warm melt will do.<br />
<br />
Bam, out of the oven, I threw on plenty of rocket on one side of each Slimbo, put two rashers on each of the rocket piles and closed them over.<br />
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<br /></div>
Delicious, I can not find any fault whatsoever in the taste of these, they're lovely and exactly what I'm after in a bread except for the lack of 'fillingness'.<br />
I was not completely full after three of these and usually two (three) rasher sandwiches will have me stuffed.<br />
<br />
I think doubling them in size would make them into something special, they'd have all the handiness and perfect proportions of normal slices of bread with the flavours and textures that come from a seeded roll...<br />
<br />
Pat The Baker, my good friend, let me appeal to your good nature, please, pretty please with rashers on top, for all the people like me, you're onto a good thing, you can make it happen, let us walk into our local shops and see the shelves bending under the weight of your next revolutionary product...<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<i>Pat The Baker's <b>FATSOS</b></i></div>
<b><br /></b>
<b>B.S</b><br />
<b><br /></b>
Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-20336727017005905212012-12-21T19:13:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:23:25.648+01:00Not One Bit Of This Was Smart...Due to the economic cluster fuck that's enriching our lovely little allotment at the moment I have found myself in the enviable position of no longer having to live by the previously con-straining and creatively stifling norms of 9-5 life and the constant gnawing of the well worn snooze button.<br />
<br />
Or to put it in almost football like terms; The Boozey Swine. He sleeps when he wants.<br />
And as such I eat when I want.<br />
Like I did last a few weeks ago with this fine mess.<br />
Wednesday night, a few sociable pints in good company that blossomed into a few cans (with levels of sociability at this point diminishing at a fairly predictable rate) followed by the uphill 2 mile 4am walk (a generous verb given the circumstances) to the home place, and without getting dramatic my denim jeans/denim jacket ensemble didn't really afford me adequate protection from the elements.<br />
Add to all this I'd probably in the previous 24 hours, given my hectic schedule, eaten nothing but a bowl of cereal.<br />
I was understandably tired, hungry, cold and emotional so the usual defences that I'd conditioned into my brain to stop,<i> for the love of God</i>, cooking/eating at awful hours like this had easily been anesthetized.<br />
<br />
<u>The Serious Shit/Disclaimer:</u><br />
I'll never be one to advocate cooking in this condition, especially when you're alone. The sudden warmth and comfort of a house will send your body and brain to quickly prioritise sleep over food regardless of how hungry you are and the 18-22 minutes that the average pizza takes to cook is more than ample time for your body to switch off.<br />
Luckily this hasn't happened to me, but I know of a number of people who've ruined food and more importantly ovens after falling asleep and I even know of one person who burnt their kitchen down after a chip pan fire.<br />
If you really must cook in this condition (and really have a bit of cop on and don't) leave it to appliances that can shut off on a timer and set a countdown alarm on your phone. Let's not see a good pizza wasted.<br />
<br />
<br />
It's a weekly ritual of mine to scour around the sauce aisles of the local shops looking for new products that might have a positive effect on my life. My sauces of choice of late have been getting hotter and spicier by the week as I've been finding it harder and harder to re live the glory of that first buzz.<br />
<div>
<br /></div>
<br />
Now this is being published partly in the hope that it'll sufficiently put me off ever doing it again. Clearly the combination of ingredients I used to make the following sauce had little bearing on flavour and all on how much heat I could create with absolutely no consideration on what state it was going to leave me in the next day.<br />
<br />
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<br />
I just went through the kitchen and took out everything with a bit of heat in it, of course I did have a little sense and blended everything with some mayonnaise, I'm not a complete maniac.<br />
So I ended up with some ground Black Pepper, some ground Jamie Oliver, Jalapeño Hot Sauce, Habanero Ketchup, English Mustard, Mayo, Paprika and Cayenne Chilli Pepper.<br />
<br />
I used it as a crust dipping sauce for this lad...<br />
<br />
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<br />
Cooked the pizza and slightly over cooked some curly fries...<br />
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Get a close up on that shite....<br />
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Mixed up it looks a lot less offensive...<br />
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There's no point describing the taste unless you want me to say it tasted like a box of matches. My insides didn't cool down for about 2 days after it. Do not do this to yourself, I did so you don't have to.<br />
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The pizza, which I've had without the lava is delicious, well worth a few quid. For a much nicer crust dipping sauce I recommend a combination of the 'Heinz Green Jalapeño Hot Sauce' and the 'Hot-Headz Habanero Ketchup' cut with some mayonnaise... You can even arrange it into an Italian flag, perfect for pizza!<br />
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Boozey Swine<br />
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7281197689033425776.post-1182496238184967502012-12-21T18:11:00.000+00:002017-04-11T12:27:35.329+01:00Curry, Cheese and Coleslaw ChipsI'd been hearing murmurings for a while about the existence of this variation of chips but I'd yet to see it on a menu in any of my local chip dealerships, and as far as I know (I'm sure I'll be corrected if I'm wrong) no Newbridge chippers offer coleslaw as a topping so I had to assemble this myself.<br />
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I've already covered in great detail the topic of <a href="http://www.theboozeyswine.com/2011/05/curry-cheese-chips-as-they-should-be.html" target="_blank">Curry Cheese Chips</a> so I'll avoid repeating myself only to say that like any sandwich you must give plenty of consideration to what the optimal temperature of each ingredient is, ie coleslaw will turn manky if it's let sit on top of hot chips and hot curry for any length of time. To combat any issues proper assembly and immediate consumption is in your best interests.<br />
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This was made on an evening when one of my scavenging hunts went particularly well; some oven chips left in the freezer, good white cheddar and coleslaw in the fridge and some curry powder lying around too. You want to prioritise the layering in this order: Chips, curry sauce, cheese and finally coleslaw (more cheese on top optional and recommended).<br />
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The addition of the coleslaw really ups the poshness of this dish. You wouldn't be ashamed to serve it to the mother in law or a local politician should they drop by for a friendly chat.<br />
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I think this would work even better with some of those spicy curly chips but I'd none at the time. A very satisfying dinner that leaves you feeling quite a bit healthier in body and mind than you would after regular curry cheese chips.<br />
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Boozey Swine<br />
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Giz a like or a follow on <a href="http://www.facebook.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Facebook</a>, <a href="http://www.instagram.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Instagram</a> and <a href="http://www.twitter.com/theboozeyswine" target="_blank">Twitter</a><br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/12207172555628842107noreply@blogger.com0